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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27287875">teo torriatte (let us cling together)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingerslapNotion/pseuds/gingerslapNotion'>gingerslapNotion</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Queen, Hatsune Miku, and Other Self-Indulgences [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>"Victor Nikiforov and Lev Haiba are cousins" AU, (oh my god they were roommates), Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - No COVID-19, Angst, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Getting Together, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Music, Kenma has social anxiety, M/M, Minor Hinata Shouyou/Aone Takanobu, Not Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Kozume Kenma, POV Third Person, Relationship Issues, Roommates, Social Anxiety, small cameo by several precure characters becus i can</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 17:35:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,066</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27287875</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingerslapNotion/pseuds/gingerslapNotion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>December 2020: Kenma and Lev have been roommates for over six years, and dating for four. Lev is going to graduate from his veterinary program in just a few months, and Kenma is worried about how it could change (or maybe even end) their relationship. In the midst of his anxiety, Kenma comes home one day to Lev showing him two tickets to the National Ice Skating Championships, where Lev's cousin's husband, Katsuki Yuri, is competing.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Haiba Lev/Kozume Kenma, Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Queen, Hatsune Miku, and Other Self-Indulgences [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1992415</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Lev Weekend 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. as the years go by, part one: i’ve gotten a tiny bit stronger than before</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This fic is dedicated to my mom, to whom I owe my love of music, and particularly Queen. I probably would never have known about <a href="https://youtu.be/sbNmSs66qMA">Teo Torriatte</a> if it weren't for her. I love you mom!<br/>It is also dedicated to everyone who's ever let me ramble at them about this idea, in particular Mar, Chu, Zoe and Ven. ily guys so much!!&lt;3</p><p>This fic has been living rent-free in my mind for at least two whole years now, so I'm very excited to FINALLY be posting it! I've put a lot of my time and energy into it so I hope you all enjoy!!!</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Fall 2014: Kenma has never felt more alone than now, in his first year of university at UTokyo. He finds comfort in visiting practices at Nekoma when he has the time, in seeing his juniors hard at work - one of them in particular. So when Lev tells him that he'll be attending UTokyo as well, and that they should be roommates, Kenma surprises everyone, most of all himself, when he says yes.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A couple notes before you begin:<br/>- Because it's Kenma POV I mostly use characters' given names instead of family names, with a few exceptions.<br/>- The way Kenma's social anxiety presents itself is mostly based on my own lived experiences.<br/>- This fic is canon divergent/not canon compliant because I wasn't caught up with the manga when started planning it. I imagine some important thing didn't happen and it caused a butterfly effect.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
<p></p><div><p>Kenma’s first year of university was the loneliest time of his life. It was only after he’d left his teammates behind that he knew exactly how important they had been. He’d tried out for the University of Tokyo’s volleyball team of course, and was pleasantly surprised when he actually got in (not that he didn’t know his own skill, but then skill was never his real issue). But the team didn’t fit right in the hole Nekoma has left in his life; it just wasn’t the same without his high school teammates, and without all their many familiar rivals. On top of that, classes were tough (it was university after all), and quitting organized volleyball left Kenma more time to complete his coursework, thereby keeping his anxiety in check; so quit he did.</p></div><div><p>It wasn’t as though he was completely isolated; he still texted Kuro several times a day and kept in touch with most of his former teammates, as well as Shouyou and some members of the other Tokyo teams. When he could he took the train nine stops to practices at Nekoma, on orders both from Kuro to watch over the team for him and from Morisuke to keep a certain ace’s head from swelling too much. And every time he arrived, he was greeted by his name shouted loudly from across the gym followed by a surprisingly gentle hug from long, pale arms that he always complained about but never tried to free himself from. (He was just touch-deprived, that was all. Nothing more. Right?) He'd share his "great wisdom" (as Sou put it) with the new setters, or help even out scrims, or even just keep score; and of course, catch up with his kouhai. As it had ever been, Lev was always the most enthusiastic to talk to him - he would prattle on about everything and anything, from the most recent Tokyo training camp to the cat he'd rescued last week, the fifth one this month, and was always sure to ask Kenma how he was doing as well. Though once Kenma might've been annoyed, he now found it a comfort in his new university life. Even with the voice in the back of his mind nagging him about how much potential study time he was missing, his visits to his alma mater were a welcome reprieve from the isolation he found himself surrounded by on campus.</p></div><div><p>Eventually, the school year began to wrap up. Kenma went with Kuro to watch Nekoma play at Nationals - they ended up beating Karasuno to take second place overall, and Kuro cried. Afterwards they met up with the team at an izakaya near the stadium, and it was there that Lev told Kenma that he would be attending UTokyo too, for veterinary school, and he was so excited to spend more time with Kenma on campus, and wouldn't it be great if they were roommates? Kenma was struck with a brief flash of anxiety - he liked Lev quite a bit, but could he really live with someone so loud and excitable? But then he thought back over the past year, and realized all the times he'd been most happy were when he was sitting next to Lev on the floor of Nekoma's gym, listening to him complain about university entrance exams, or venting about his own academic woes, or silently watching Lev beam with pride at his team. It might actually have been good for Kenma's mental health to have someone like that around more of the time. And anyway, living with a roommate would be cheaper than his single dorm room had been, so it made sense, right?</p></div><div><p>Kenma told Lev that yes, that might not be so bad.</p></div><hr/>
<p></p><div><p>Living with Lev was challenging, in some ways. He could be a bit of a slob, leaving clothes laying around on the floor or notes scattered in various places around the room since he liked to pace around while studying. He would frequently be too loud at night for Kenma's liking, but a single "Lev, be quiet now." would get the point across, and he would silence himself until morning, often picking up his thoughts right where he left them off, which Kenma found more amusing than anything. And though he was already aware Lev was something of a Hatsune Miku fanboy, Kenma didn't quite realize the extent of his mania until their first semester midterms, when he had a playlist of nothing but Miku songs playing near-constantly, another one of his studying habits. But Kenma had noise-cancelling headphones and his own studying playlist (made up mostly of video game soundtracks, an obsession of his own; glass houses and all that), and so he was able to survive the onslaught of the chipper electronic popstar and still ace all his exams.</p></div><div><p>The trade-off was, of course, that Kenma was no longer alone. That all-consuming isolation he'd experienced his first year was gone, replaced by lunches with Lev, studying sessions with Lev, video games with Lev watching over his shoulder and cheering when Kenma felled another boss. Lev also tried out for the volleyball team but, unlike Kenma, he actually stayed, and Kenma would often come to his matches to show his support, smiling in spite of himself whenever Lev would score a point and immediately look up at him in the stands, searching for praise. They played two-on-two with Shouyou and Tobio when the national team's schedule allowed the legendary duo the time, sometimes being joined by Shouyou's boyfriend Takanobu, who attended Tokai, or other high school friends of theirs who happened to be in town. Around anyone but Shouyou Kenma might've been nervous, but something about having Lev there made him open up more to the others and really enjoy himself. (He even finally befriended Tobio for real after having been intimidated by him when they were in high school, despite Kenma's supposed seniority.)</p></div></div><div>
  <p>As the year came to a close, Lev began suggesting the two of them get a real apartment after the summer break, instead of living in the dorms again.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"We'll have to get jobs, you know," Kenma told him, to which Lev replied with a grin that he'd already been cleared by his professor to work for the biology department as a TA in the next term.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev did take up a lot of space, Kenma thought, both in stature and in presence, and Kenma himself wasn't shrinking away to make room as much as he used to. A larger space to live would be beneficial for both of them.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma smiled. "Okay, let's do it."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Between studying for final exams and packing up their dorm they were able to find an apartment not too far from campus within their price range, and after the term ended, with Shouyou, Tobio, and Takanobu's help, they moved all their stuff to their new home. The new school year started without a hitch, and Kenma got extremely lucky and secured a part-time job at a video game store. For the first time in a long while, Kenma truly felt happy with where his life was at.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>And then summer vacation started, and Lev abruptly left on a family trip to Russia.</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading! Notes on this chapter:<br/>
- Lev wants to be a veterinarian because after one too many stray cats brought to practice Kuroo is just like "you should just become a vet" and Lev is like "okay!!!" and he DOES<br/>
- I have no idea where my Miku fanboy Lev headcanon came from but I'm never letting it go &gt;:)</p>
<p>Chapter one is in three parts because it ended up so long, so I'm posting one part for each day of Lev Weekend! The title of this chapter is a reference to the <a href="https://youtu.be/0Umhxj5aFfU">credits song</a> from the Lev OVA episode. Part two will be up tomorrow! See you then!</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p> EDIT 11/17/20: this fic is now mirrored on <a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte-ch-1">my new fanfic website!</a> go check it out! </p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. as the years go by, part two: who's in your heart now?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Summer 2016: Lev is visiting his family in Russia, leaving Kenma alone in their apartment with his thoughts. Something a younger Kenma would've been perfectly happy with, but to his own surprise, he finds himself realizing some unexpected feelings, and he doesn't know what to do.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This part is pretty long, at least compared to the last one, so get ready for a lot of angst and a lot of fluff. Also, this is when I really start pushing the AoHina agenda &gt;:)<br/></p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At first, things were fine, though more quiet and low-key than Kenma had grown accustomed to. Working full-time now that school was out of session, he was able to cover the cost of rent even with Lev gone. Nearly all of his free time was spent playing games in front of a fan turned on to full-speed. He watched the volleyball qualifying matches at the Olympics from his laptop, and when Team Japan made it to the quarter-finals he found himself at a watch party hosted by Takanobu. All the other guests were Miyagi students who had also moved to Tokyo like Takanobu, almost none of whom Kenma knew or even recognized, save three or four Karasuno members he hadn't ever actually spoken to. He mostly kept to himself, sitting on the floor with his back up against the couch and nursing a hard cider while ignoring Kuro's live reaction texts about the match. Japan lost 3-1, and despite his disappointment for Shouyou and Tobio, Kenma was secretly glad he at least wouldn't have to go to another party full of strangers.</p><p>On the train back home Kenma got a text from Lev:</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>        ":( poor hinata and kageyama. watched with my cousin wbu???"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>He responded:</p>
</div><div>
  <p>        "watch party @ takanobu's. no fun wish you were there"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev replied saying he wished Kenma were there instead to see the sights of Russia, which he then began listing with enthusiasm and excessive adjectives, but Kenma began fixating on what he'd just said -  "wish you were there." When he thought about it, he wished Lev was there with him, not just at the party, but all the time. Kenma had more fun when he was around. Not only that, but he felt like he <em>himself</em> was more fun. He felt like a different person, someone just a little more outgoing, more open. Someone <em>happier</em>. The summer alone in the apartment was exactly what a younger Kenma had always wanted - to play video games entirely alone, communicating with others only rarely and only by text. With time, volleyball had changed that, but outside of the sport he still avoided people as much as he could. Now here he was, playing volleyball only occasionally but craving company more than ever. He'd changed - <em>Lev</em> had changed him. Kenma had always been uncomfortable with change, but now here he was, a new person without even having noticed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "youre right that sounds nice" was all he replied.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma continued to mull over this new information as the summer dragged on, scared that he no longer understood himself but excited by who he'd apparently become. And as he did, he began to realize something else, something even more worrisome than no longer being who he thought he was. He missed who he was when Lev was around, missed the fun he had with him. But more than that, he missed the man himself. Not the way one passingly missed a friend not seen in a while, but something more aching and all-consuming. Kenma wished to hear Lev's laugh again, to see his brilliant green eyes crinkled with a smile, to feel warm in his arms. <em>Absence makes the heart grow fonder</em>, Kenma thought bitterly as he became aware of more and more of these hidden desires of his. He began wanting things from Lev that had never happened between them before -  fleeting thoughts of their fingers intertwined, of falling asleep on his chest, of kissing him softly on the cheek. Thoughts that made his face grow red and warm while ringing up a customer, or in the middle of boss fight, causing his fingers to disobey and bringing a tragic end to his character's quest. Kenma dug the heels of his palms into his eyes, wishing to join the game protagonist in the afterlife rather than continue on living with these embarrassing thoughts.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It wasn't as though Kenma hadn't had crushes before. In fact, he'd even had a crush that was <em>this bad</em> before, back in high school. The real problem was that in the past, he'd dealt with crushes by putting a safe distance between himself and the object of his desires, and letting the feelings slowly fade away. He couldn't do that now, though - because his crush was his roommate. As summer neared its end, Kenma began to fret more and more about what to do when Lev came back and he had to share an apartment with someone he desperately wanted to kiss.</p>
</div><hr/><p>Kenma found himself still without a solution to this problem when Lev returned from Russia with far too many souvenirs, from matryoshka dolls to replica Faberge eggs to special Russian chocolates. For Kenma he got something simple, a piece of Baltic amber with a long-legged insect of some sort caught within.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>"The color reminded me of your eyes! And the insect is like, you know when you get really fixated on something? It's like it's caught in your amber sight... if that makes sense, haha!" Lev said as Kenma stared at the gem in his hands. He turned away before Lev could see the warm pink forming on his cheeks.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Thanks, I like it."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Now what do you think, egg for Hinata and matryoshka for Kageyama? Or matryoshka for Hinata and egg for Kageyama? Or maybe they should both get eggs..."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>School resumed soon after. In his third year now, Kenma was told he had to start thinking about what he planned to do after college. As ever, he was reluctant for things to change too much. He'd never had lofty dreams for what he wanted to do with his life. He'd only chosen to major in mathematics because he liked math and was good at it, and now had no idea what he should use it for. But honestly, all he really wanted was for things to stay mostly the same as they were now. What would be perfect was a job in the city, that would let him keep living with Lev...</p>
</div><div>
  <p>
    <em>Lev.</em>
  </p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma still didn't know what to do about his growing feelings for his roommate, and it didn't help that Lev had grown far more affectionate since the end of the summer. He seemed to want to be touching Kenma at all times now, whether it was an arm thrown around his shoulders or a hand resting on his head. Part of Kenma wanted to think it was maybe a sign that Lev felt the same way, but his anxiety refused to let him truly believe it. Lev was just a naturally friendly person was all, surely that was all this was, right? It drove Kenma mad to think about, but at the same time, he couldn't help feeling giddy every time Lev linked their arms together, or pulled him into a hug that lifted his feet off the ground, held up only by Lev's embrace. It was intoxicating, and so dangerous because it left him feeling all the more conflicted and confused when it ended. Kenma would lie awake in his room at night, overthinking everything while simultaneously wishing Lev were there to hold him now. Between this and his fretting about the future, it was a miracle Kenma's schoolwork didn't suffer. Out of desperation he turned to Kuro for help, knowing deep down he was someone Kenma could trust, though still not expecting any useful advice. His instincts were right, because right off the bat Kuro began insisting he should just confess to Lev immediately. The thought mortified Kenma.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "cmon what do you have to lose"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "everything. i literally have everything to lose if i tell him"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "i would bet real money he'd kiss you in a heartbeat if you told him"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "how much"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "you trusted me enough to tell me, why cant you trust me now?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "social anxiety's a bitch what can i say"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>To his credit, Kuro left it at that. As much as Kenma antagonized him, Kuro really was a good friend, the best one he had, and he understood things didn't come as easily for Kenma as for the average person. He still half-seriously prodded at Kenma to come clean whenever Kenma turned to him to vent about whatever adorable thing Lev had done this time, trying to pass it off as a joke but also hoping against hope that maybe the fiftieth time would convince Kenma to actually do it (which, of course, it didn't). This was how their friendship worked, and it was a comfort to Kenma to know at least one thing hadn't changed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It was around this time that Lev expanded his music taste to include Western virtual bands, "which are basically the same as Miku but with a real singer instead of a voicebank, how cool is that!" He'd wave Kenma over at inopportune times to listen to a new song he'd just discovered, smiling expectantly at Kenma as he waited for a reaction. Most of the time, Kenma would simply offer a quick "cool" or "nice" just to escape Lev's intense gaze before his flushing became too obvious, but there were several songs he did end up listening to again on his own. <a href="https://youtu.be/zRDj1cu0X-8">One song in particular</a>, about falling for someone unexpectedly and without realizing, resonated with Kenma, for obvious reasons. He <em>had</em> scared himself! He <em>was</em> all of a doo-dah, whatever that meant. But the song never reached a proper conclusion for the assumed "you," with the feelings either being acted upon or allowed to run their course. Instead, the song ended with the advice "you better hold on to love," which Kenma thought was a little too optimistic. To him it seemed more that it was <em>love</em> holding on to <em>him</em> and refusing to let go, no matter how he struggled.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It didn't stop him from listening to the song on repeat while daydreaming of falling asleep in Lev's arms, however.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Towards the start of third term, Kenma's dilemma came to a head.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It started like any other dinner they'd had up to that point. Shouyou and Takanobu seated on one side of the table, nestled together as natural as anything, Kenma and Lev on the other, and Tobio, alone at the head of the table. Everyone was slightly tipsy, thanks to Lev's insistence that they all try the new (expensive) sake their favorite izakaya had just added to the drink menu. Lev had one arm thrown casually around Kenma's shoulders, which Kenma might've minded the implications of if his mind were sharper. But thanks to the dulling effect of the alcohol, all he could focus on was how nice the weight of it felt and how warm Lev's skin was against the back of his neck. Everyone at the table seemed to glow with the contentment of a filling meal after a long day; everyone but Tobio, that is. He stared into the middle distance, glaring at nothing in particular, his shoulders slumped and his hands limp in his lap.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What's with the sour face, Bakageyama?" Shouyou asked, prodding him in the arm with a finger.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"'s nothing," Tobio mumbled. His cheeks reddened, and Kenma noted that it didn't seem to be the alcohol to blame. </p>
</div><div>
  <p>"C'mooooon, tell meeeeee," Shouyou insisted, poking at Tobio's cheeks now with increased frequency. Finally, Tobio snapped.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm just sick of being the single guy, okay!?" he half-shouted, failing to regulate his volume in his inebriated state.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma's blood ran cold. He could feel Lev's eyes on him; Kenma couldn't imagine what he was thinking right then. Kenma hardly knew what he himself was thinking right then, really. And so-</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"We're not together!" He blurted out. He probably could've found a way to say it with more tact if he'd thought a second longer, but he was so desperate to keep his true feelings hidden from Lev that his split-second decision prioritized saying something, anything at all, over thinking rationally.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>There was an awkward pause at the table. Lev removed his arm from Kenma's shoulder, and he found himself missing the grounding pressure of it already.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh." Tobio said, sounding dumbstruck. "I just assumed-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"We're just roommates. Friends."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm sorry-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"It's okay."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Another pause followed. Then-</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"It's getting late," Takanobu said. "Lev-san, you said you have practice tomorrow."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh. Mm." Lev responded quietly, and stood. The bill had already been paid so the five men were only waiting for someone to initiate their departure, which Takanobu seemed to have taken advantage of. The rest of them stood as well, collecting their belongings in silence and heading to the door. They bid each other subdued goodbyes on the sidewalk and headed in their different directions home.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma and Lev were roommates, of course, so they went home together - but it was different now. Lev barely touched Kenma, barely even looked at him; he stared ahead, silent, expressionless, a far cry from the tactile and talkative man he'd been just a few minutes ago. Where Lev would've invaded Kenma's space on the train, scooting up next to him and leaning over his shoulder to watch him play Love Live, he now sat squarely in his own seat, careful not to cross the dividing line between them, even with just a stray hand movement. Kenma was puzzled by it. Had he hurt Lev's feelings with his outburst? That he'd said they were just roommates before he'd said they were friends? It didn't help that the alcohol was starting to give him a headache, and they'd stayed out far later than they'd planned. Kenma decided that his dilemma could better be solved if he'd had a few hours sleep, and to leave it be for now. He nearly started leaning on Lev's shoulder to doze off before catching himself and sitting up straight again.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>They got off at their stop and trudged to their apartment, still not speaking, still pointedly distant from each other. They got inside and started to head towards their separate rooms without a word before Lev stopped Kenma - he grabbed Kenma's shoulder, then immediately let go, seeming to have regretted touching him at all.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What?" Kenma asked softly. Maybe he would get a solution to his puzzle.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm gonna try to get some practice in early before the rest of the team shows up so-" he refused to look at Kenma's face. "If you wake up and I'm gone, um. That's why."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh. Uh, okay." Kenma responded. He wasn't expecting that at all. "Sounds good. Goodnight,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Goodnight." Lev replied, heading to his room and shutting the door. Kenma followed suit, noting that Lev rarely closed his door all the way at night. He changed into his pajamas, plugged in his phone and crawled under the covers. But as dead tired as he was, Kenma didn't fall asleep just yet. It was still bugging him that Lev had suddenly become so quiet and distant. Lev thought they were just friends, right? Lev's touchy-feeliness was just him being friendly. Shouldn't Lev have argued with Tobio then? Why would he be upset at <em>Kenma</em>, unless...</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Unless Lev didn't want to be "just friends" either.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh my god, I'm a fucking idiot." Kenma groaned, pulling his pillow over his face.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev returned his feelings after all, and Kenma had just stomped all over his heart without realizing. Brilliant.</p>
</div><hr/><p>Kenma found he couldn't fall asleep until he could hear Lev's snoring from across the hallway, anxiety keeping him awake until he was sure his roommate was asleep. He woke up the next morning to find Lev gone, as he'd promised. In the stark light of day, his mind no longer fogged by alcohol, Kenma now had no excuse not to contend with his difficult position. He decided he could at least do it while taking a nice soak (at least there was one upside to Lev being out of the apartment - Kenma's bath wouldn't be interrupted for once).</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>He brushed his teeth while the tub filled, then put his hair in a loose bun and climbed in, leaning back against the wall of the tub and letting the steaming water soothe his anxieties, even if just a little bit.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>So.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev liked him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma couldn't stop his smile. <em>Lev liked him!</em> Maybe even wanted to be with him! It was all Kenma had wanted for so long, of course the thought made him positively giddy, a word he would never have used to describe himself until then. But also - </p>
</div><div>
  <p>Thanks to Kenma's careless outburst, Lev thought Kenma <em>didn't</em> like <em>him</em>.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Bakageyama," Kenma said, imitating Shouyou's voice, and laughed a little in spite of himself. It wasn't really Tobio's fault of course (though Kenma couldn't help but wonder how things might've gone had he not said anything). No, this was all Kenma's fault, and so it was up to Kenma to fix it. But how?</p>
</div><div>
  <p>This was where he'd normally turn to Kuro for advice - except he'd already done that, and not taken it, even though Kuro had been right all along. (<em>Shit, Kuro had been right all along!</em> Kenma felt like he'd lost a bet he'd never actually made.) Kenma couldn't stand the thought of slinking back to him for help, his pride wouldn't allow it. He would have to figure out a solution all on his own.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>But then again, if Kuro had been right about Lev's feelings, maybe his original advice would be right too. Frankly, Kenma couldn't see any way out without telling Lev one way or another, and doing it directly to his face seemed like the quickest and easiest way to get it done. </p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Goddammit." Kenma muttered, sinking further into the water. How was Kuro so right about everything? It was just unfair.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Then Kenma was struck with another thought: what if his outburst had been so harsh that Lev no longer wanted to be with him? Though something told him Lev wouldn't give up on a crush that easily, maybe it would be better if Kenma said nothing for now. Maybe then things could just go back to how they were.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>But Kenma didn't want that, he realized. He didn't want to go back to stewing in his feelings, waiting for a change that would never come if he didn't make it happen himself. He was tired of letting his social anxiety get the best of him - so he wouldn't make the mistake of staying silent, not again. </p>
</div><div>
  <p>He was going to tell Lev the truth.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>And if his fears were not unfounded, and Lev no longer wanted to live with him when he found out? Well, it would all be Kuro's fault then. And surely such a good friend would certainly be willing to make it up to Kenma by letting him crash on the couch.</p>
</div><hr/><p>Kenma waited all day for Lev to get back from practice. Antsy, he paced the apartment looking for something to do besides homework or video games, both of which he couldn't seem to focus on in his nervous state. He somehow landed upon cleaning the apartment, which in hindsight made sense as it doubled as a nice gesture to Lev when he finally arrived home. He took out all the trash, tidied all the shared spaces, and wiped down the kitchen counters. He was in the middle of cleaning out the fridge when he heard the sound of keys in the door, and his heart immediately began pounding as he headed to the front of the apartment. The door swung open and Lev came inside, and seeing him for the first time that day, for the first time since Kenma had figured out the truth, soothed him in a way he didn't even know was possible until now. His nerves didn't calm much, but along with them came a strange sort of clarity - this was the right thing to do, and he was ready to do it.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>"Lev, I have something important to tell you-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Actually, Kenma, can it wait?" Lev interrupted him, still refusing to make eye contact as he had the night before. "I'm kind of exhausted, and I have practice again tomorrow, as well as work for class, I think I should just go to bed."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh... Yeah, definitely. Get some rest then," Kenma replied, blindsided. "I... I can wait." He stepped aside to allow Lev through.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Goodnight," Lev said quickly, and rushed to his room, shutting the door behind him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma was left standing in the entryway, processing what had just happened. It made sense, the team was preparing for spring tournament, and Lev <em>had</em> done some extra practice on top of that, of course he'd be tired. Kenma could just tell him tomorrow. He finished cleaning the fridge and then he too went to bed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Tomorrow, then.</p>
</div><hr/><p>The next day proceeded much the same. Kenma woke to Lev already gone, he spent the day working on various chores and steeling himself to confess his feelings, and when Lev finally arrived home, he offered the same brief excuse of exhaustion and immediately retired to his room. The day after that, between classes, Kenma's job and Lev's practice, they were both out of the apartment for most of the day. Kenma had the closing shift, and when he got home, he saw the light on underneath Lev's closed door. He knocked.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>"Lev? Would now be a good time to talk?" He asked.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Sorry, I have to study for a microbio exam," Lev said through the door. Kenma waited for some follow-up after this, but none came.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh. Okay," He said flatly, and went to his room.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>There was no doubt about it in Kenma's mind anymore; Lev was avoiding him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>This continued for several days. Lev spent as much time out of the apartment as he could, saying he was getting in extra practice, or studying at the library, or another perfectly-reasonable-but-definitely-still-trying-to-avoid-Kenma explanation. Kenma tried valiantly every chance he got to speak with Lev, and every time Lev gave an excuse about having more studying to do still or just being too tired, and went to his room, shutting the door behind him every time. It was driving Kenma mad. Lev was surprisingly good at keeping to himself when he wanted to, and as desperate as Kenma was, he was hesitant to make the situation even worse by forcing himself into Lev's space. It also didn't help that Kenma was beginning to miss the closeness they'd had before everything had gone south, craving Lev's touch worse than ever.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Part of him wanted to just give up, but his own selective stubbornness wouldn't let him, especially when he knew the payoff would be so wonderfully sweet.</p>
</div><div>
  <p><em>Unless it isn't</em>, his anxiety said, but he shook the thought away. He'd made up his mind to be optimistic for once in his life and he was going to <em>stick</em> to it, dammit!</p>
</div><div>
  <p>He was tempted to ask Kuro for advice, but his pride still wouldn't allow it. If it were anyone but Kuro, it would be fine, but he couldn't think of who else could possibly help him. Except...</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Takanobu! Of course!" he said out loud in the middle of stocking the shelves at work, earning him a strange look from the two customers in the store at the time. He blushed, quickly set out the rest of the copies of Stardew Valley and headed into the staff room to text Takanobu.</p>
</div><hr/><p>Kenma saw Takanobu as something of a kindred spirit. He'd been somewhat intimidated by the larger, grim-faced man the first time they met - that was, until Shouyou introduced him as his boyfriend, and Kenma noticed the soft pink blush on his cheeks and the even softer way he gazed at Shouyou, and Kenma knew instantly he was harmless. Takanobu was even more taciturn than Kenma himself, which was something of a comfort to Kenma. The two of them hadn't had many one-on-one conversations, given they mostly spent time in the group of five that was rounded out by the loquacious Hinata Shouyou and Haiba Lev and the perpetually argumentative Kageyama Tobio. But Takanobu was kind, and Kenma knew he would certainly be willing to offer some advice to Kenma if he asked.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>The other thing that made Takanobu the perfect person to turn to was that he was dating Shouyou, who was in many ways quite similar to Lev. This had been true since high school, when the two of them had often egged each other on to the point of distraction at training camps, often ending up scolded by their respective captains. (Kenma certainly seemed to have a type.) Because of this, Takanobu's experience dealing with Shouyou's bad days could provide some insight to Kenma about how he ought to proceed with Lev.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "hey takanobu can i ask for some advice"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "yes." (Even over text, Takanobu was a man of few words.)</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "the other day at dinner, when i said lev and i werent a couple. it turns out i was sort of wrong about that"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "i figured." Kenma was surprised at this, but pressed on.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "i want to tell him im sorry and that i do return his feelings but hes avoiding me and wont let me get a word in. what would you do if it were shouyou?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>There was a brief pause in the texts, then-</p>
</div><div>
  <p>    "shouyou did the same thing after getting back from rio. what did the trick was interrupting him while he was practicing on his own and talking through it with him then. i think if you show lev this is something you want to talk about enough to go out of your way and not just where you would normally see him anyway that will help him to understand his importance to you."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It was the most words Takanobu had ever spoken to Kenma at once, and he took it to heart, thanking Takanobu profusely. The next day, he asked an acquaintance in his coding class who was also on the volleyball team what time their practice that evening was, explaining that he would maybe drop by to watch Lev play. In truth, he was actually avoiding dropping in on Lev when his teammates were around, wanting to make sure it was just the two of them when they spoke. Practice ended at eight, and Kenma got to the gym around 7:50. The rest of the team started to trickle out at 8:10, but as expected, Lev was not with them. When he was confident enough people had left that he and Lev would be able to have some privacy, Kenma headed in.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Just as he entered the gym, he saw Lev, at the far end, toss a ball in the air, running and jumping to serve it beautifully to the other side of the net, just before the edge of the court. Kenma's heart jumped into his throat.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev!" he shouted out into the empty space, reminding him of days in high school when he was the one avoiding human contact and Lev was the one shouting his name across the gym, forcing Kenma to be a part of the world. Kenma figured he ought to return the favor.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Kenma?" Lev wondered aloud, clearly surprised to see him there. For a moment he was excited, then seemed to remember that he was supposed to be sulking right then and turned away from Kenma, picking up another ball. Kenma walked across the gym as he delivers another perfect serve, and Kenma can't help but admire how far he'd come since he was just a rookie first year who'd never touched a volleyball in his life. He was preparing to serve again when Kenma arrived at his side, and he slumped.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What." he asked flatly, clearly trying to sound as grumpy as he possibly could. He refused to look at Kenma still.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, please, I have something very important to tell you," Kenma said softly, gingerly reaching a hand up to Lev's shoulder. Lev flinched, but didn't shrug him off. "It can't wait anymore. Can we talk now?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Finally, for the first time since Tobio had opened his drunken mouth, Lev looked at Kenma's face, looked into his eyes.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I really do have to practice, you know,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p><em>Of course he'd say something like that</em>, Kenma thought with a smile. Alright, he could still make this work.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>And so for the first time ever, instead of Lev having to beg him or being ordered to by a captain or coach, Kenma offered-</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"How about I set for you, then?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev couldn't help it - though he managed to maintain a neutral expression otherwise, his eyes widened in excitement.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Y-yeah. Sure, thanks."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Though the two of them no longer played together in any official capacity, their casual games with friends had kept their setter-spiker dynamic sharp since high school. Even despite barely talking for weeks, they fell quickly into a natural rhythm.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"A little higher next time," Lev requested, "Nakamura's taller than you." Kenma nodded wordlessly and complied, and a moment later the sound of Lev's spike resounded powerfully around the empty gym.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm sorry," Kenma said abruptly as Lev retrieved another ball. He tossed it to Kenma, who set it high again, and Lev spiked it right into the corner of the court, making Kenma's heart swell with pride.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev looked at Kenma expectantly, and he continued.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"For what I said at dinner. I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you." Lev turned away, picked up another ball.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"It's okay, I don't blame you," Lev told him, though it definitely didn't sound to Kenma like it <em>was</em> fully okay with him. He tossed the ball to Kenma, who set it again, and Lev delivered another perfect spike.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I kinda thought you'd already figured it out by then, but I guess not," he continued with a small, sad laugh, "It's alright though. You just don't like me the way I like you, I can live with that."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I sort of had, actually, but I refused to believe it," Kenma said apologetically. "But that's not why I said what I said."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Another toss, another set, another spike.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Then why?" Lev asked, looking at him hurt and confused. Kenma stepped towards him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"The truth was, I panicked," Kenma answered, looking into his eyes, "Because I was afraid of <em>you</em> figuring out <em>my</em> feelings." Lev's eyes went wide again.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"<em>Your</em> feelings?" he repeated. "Your feelings... for <em>me</em>?" Kenma smiled and nodded. There was a pause, where Kenma could almost hear Lev's brain processing, and then he broke into a wide grin. A split second later he had Kenma in his arms, lifting him off the floor and spinning him around the court, laughing with joy. Kenma clung tight to him, partially out of fear of getting dropped but mostly out of happiness. After a moment of this Kenma's feet found solid ground again, and he looked up at Lev's face - to see him leaning down for a kiss. Kenma pulled away.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Sorry!" He said immediately as Lev opened his eyes. "Sorry, I just... I don't think I can do that yet. Sorry."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev thought about this, and then shrugged.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'll wait then." Kenma smiled gratefully as Lev let go of him. And then, Lev yawned mightily.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Ready to wrap up practice?" Kenma asked, and Lev nodded through his yawn. Kenma helped him gather up all the balls into the basket, take down the net and quickly clean the floor. As they left the darkened gym, Kenma noticed the warmth of Lev's hand hovering hesitantly near his own. He grabbed hold of it, interlacing their fingers, observing how small his hand felt in Lev's. Lev looked down at him with surprise.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"This is okay?" He asked. In response, Kenma gave his hand a squeeze.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yes, this is fine."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev smiled and squeezed back, just shy of too hard. They walked back to their apartment hand in hand, only parting when they retired to their separate rooms. Lev left his door open, and for the first time, so did Kenma.</p>
</div><hr/><p>They started to grow into each other's space again, closer now than ever. Lev seemed to be unable to stop grinning whenever they were together, a grin that made Kenma's heart soar. They moved slow at first, as if they were both still adjusting to the reality that their feelings were requited.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>"We don't have to keep it a secret, but do you think we could wait a bit to tell our friends?" Kenma asked quietly as they sat together on the couch, sharing a blanket.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Aww, but I want to be able to tell everyone I meet 'look, this is my boyfriend Kenma!'" Lev said with a pout. Kenma looked into his eyes, gave his hand a squeeze.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I just need a little while. Please?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev squeezed back. "Of course! Anything you want."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Spring tournament came, and UTokyo did surprisingly well. Lev claimed it was because he had Kenma at every game to cheer him on. He would blow kisses to Kenma in the stands after particularly good plays, causing Kenma to flush and smile as he mimed catching them. The crowds were big enough, filled with other UTokyo students who'd come to show their support, that Kenma didn't feel uncomfortable with such displays of affection - the kiss could've easily been directed to the crowd as a whole, and it wasn't as though anyone was paying attention to Kenma to notice his reaction.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Eventually, however, the team made it into the top eight, at which point Lev thought it would be appropriate to invite their friends to come. Kenma didn't argue, though he realized their PDA would be more conspicuous to people who knew them and wasn't exactly comfortable with that.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>To his relief, Lev remembered his request, and during the match he instead would wave in the direction of where Kenma and their friends were seated together. It was a close match, but UTokyo ended up winning to advance to the semifinals. After the game they all went to dinner again. Lev made a point not to be too affectionate, and though Kenma was grateful, he noticed Lev seemed down, similar to at the beginning of the term when he thought Kenma didn't like him back, and Kenma was struck with a pang of sadness. He hated to see Lev like this, and so in that moment he decided the "little while" he'd requested was up. He took Lev's hand in his under the table, scrunched his eyes closed, and placed a kiss on his cheek. Lev gasped.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You can tell everyone now," Kenma said softly, his face red, then pulled away. Lev grinned with pure glee.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Guys! Look, this is my boyfriend, Kenma!" he announced to the table, lifting their clasped hands up for everyone to see.</p>
</div><div>
  <p> "Ooooohhh! Congratulations!" Shouyou said with somehow even more enthusiasm than usual, his eyes shining brightly with happiness for his friends. Takanobu looked at Kenma knowingly and gave him a small smile and nod.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"So now I really <em>am</em> the only single one," Kageyama grumbled, only half serious, before offering a quiet "congratulations."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Bakageyama, do we need to find someone for you?" Shouyou laughed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Absolutely not! Idiot," Kageyama shouted, his face turning red.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>The semifinals came a week later. Kuro and Koutarou miraculously were able to slip away from graduation preparations to join Kenma and their other friends in the stands. There were greetings and overpowering hugs, some introductions and a reshuffling of seating before the six men were settled again.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Any good news regarding you and the tall glass of uncooked spaghetti?" Kuro asked Kenma with a smirk, nudging him with an elbow that caused him to bump into Tobio on his other side. Kenma glared and shoved him back into Koutarou.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Shut up, stop being so annoying,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"So that's a no, huh? Too bad," Kuro said, genuinely sorry, pulling him into a half-hug with his arm. Kenma rolled his eyes.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>The teams came out, and Lev immediately began searching the stands for his friends. They waved their arms to get his attention, and once he saw them he waved back. Then he blew a kiss to Kenma, who smiled, no longer showing any signs of embarrassment as he mimed catching it. Lev grinned, then joined the rest of his team to warm up. Kuro stared at Kenma with wide eyes, mouth agape.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You- he- <em>why didn't you tell me</em>?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Now it was Kenma's turn to smirk at him. "I wanted to see your reaction, I thought it would be amusing, and you didn't disappoint."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Kenmaaaaaaaaa, so mean," Kuro whined, his head slumping down onto Kenma's shoulder. Once again, Kenma pushed him back into Koutarou, who caught him in his arms with a laugh.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Oh man, he totally got you, huh?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Shut up, Bo," Kuro said with a pout. "I can't believe my oldest, dearest friend no longer trusts me... I'm distraught." He sighed and raised a hand to his forehead dramatically. Shouyou snickered at his theatrics.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You're overreacting," Kenma said, unable to stop a small smiling from forming at Kuro's antics. He grabbed Kuro's arm and pulled him back upright. "Let's just watch the game."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>UTokyo ended up losing the match. As soon as he was allowed, Kenma was at Lev's side to comfort him. They had their first kiss there, in the hallway outside the locker room.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You did amazing, I'm so proud of you," Kenma told Lev, tenderly cupping his cheek, brushing away a tear with his thumb. Lev smiled at this.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"That already makes it better."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>UTokyo still had to play the other losing team for third place, and everyone agreed to stay and show their support with Kenma. At one point during the second set, when UTokyo had fully shaken off their funk after the earlier loss and were comfortably ahead in points, Kuro asked Kenma if he wouldn't mind stepping out for a moment to talk.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>They sat down next to each other on a bench, Kenma silently waiting for Kuro to begin talking.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"...We're not like we used to be," he finally said, leaning back with his head in his hands.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma knew what he meant. He hugged his knees to his chest. "No, we're not."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I thought this might happen," Kuro said, "when I decided to leave Tokyo for school. I thought, 'Kenma's a big kid now, he can handle himself without me.' I'm glad I was right, at least,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma shrugged with a smile. "I almost couldn't, at least that first year. I admit, I was so lonely without you. But then, Lev..." he trailed off.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yes, <em>then Lev</em>." Kuro grinned slyly, making Kenma blush. "You know, I credit myself. If I hadn't made you set for him all those years ago when he first joined the team, none of this would've happened!"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma rolled his eyes. "Uh-huh, <em>suuuuure</em>, whatever you say."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm serious! I could tell he had eyes for you from the moment he saw you. And I knew he'd be a good influence on you as well,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Wait, you- you mean he... even back then?" Kenma was genuinely surprised. He'd known Lev fell for people incredibly easily - it wasn't hard to tell with the dopey, star-struck way he acted around Morisuke, or the way he tried to emulate Tora's technique when he wasn't looking, or how much he gushed about Keiji and the tall blond from Karasuno long after training camps had ended. Had Lev been talking about Kenma like that when he wasn't around?</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You seriously didn't know? Man, for someone who used to be known for his keen eye, you really can be oblivious sometimes," Kuro laughed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>So many things suddenly made far more sense to Kenma now. Lev always had been far more affectionate with him than with anyone else, but it never registered to Kenma as evidence of a crush. Maybe because he'd never known Lev to act any other way, it didn't register as abnormal behavior? Kenma couldn't say. In retrospect, he felt pretty stupid for not putting it together sooner. But then, why did Lev get more intense after coming back from Russia? He supposed he would have to ask the man himself later on.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is... We're still close, we'll always be close. I just wanted to you know I'm glad you have someone else you can rely on now besides me," Kuro said, leaning forward to look Kenma in the eyes, a hand on his shoulder, "I'm really proud of you Kenma, and even more than that, I'm so, so happy for you,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma felt a surge of warmth grow in his chest and catch in his throat, and he leaned over to pull Kuro into an awkward sitting embrace. It was one of the very few times he'd been the one to initiate a hug between them, and Kuro tensed for a moment, surprised, before wrapping his arms tightly around Kenma's shaking body.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Aww, are you crying?" Kuro asked with a laugh.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Sh-shut up," Kenma snapped back, messily wiping his cheeks with the palm of his hand. They parted, Kenma still sniffling a bit, and Kuro offered him a napkin he happened to have in his pocket, which Kenma used to dry his eyes properly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Also! I better be the very first person you tell when you get engaged!" Kuro said, crossing his arms.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Don't get ahead of yourself," Kenma replied with a glare, wiping his nose. In response Kuro only grinned.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>The two men headed back into the stands. Lev noticed that Kenma had returned and made a little heart with his fingers, before getting yelled at by a teammate for getting distracted.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Some things just don't change, huh," Kuro mused to Koutarou as he took his seat beside him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"That's definitely new, though," Koutarou answered, gesturing at a laughing Kenma.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>UTokyo ended up taking third place in the end. Lev was exhausted and didn't feel up to another dinner out, so everyone said their goodbyes and headed home. As Kenma and Lev were about leave, Lev clinging sleepily to Kenma with his cheek resting against the top of Kenma's head, Kuro caught ahold of Lev's shoulder to stop them.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, I forgot to say-" Lev yawned in his face. "- take care of Kenma, will you?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Of course, Kuroo-senpai," Lev said at the end of his yawn, tightening his arms around Kenma's shoulders. "I love him, after all,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kuro then looked at Kenma, whose heart was now hammering in his chest at what Lev had just said.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You better take care of him too, Kenma. He's a keeper,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What does it look like I'm doing?" Kenma answered with a huff of embarrassment as he adjusted Lev's body to better support his weight. "He needs to sleep. Can we go now?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yup, that's it! See you again soon!" Kuro said with a cheeky grin. He turned and jogged back to where Koutarou was waiting for him in the direction of where they'd parked, and as he did he shouted over his shoulder with a wave- "Congratulations again! On everything!"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma rolled his eyes, and Lev yawned again.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Come on, let's go home."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev fell asleep on the train, still slumped over on Kenma's head and shoulders. Kenma traced the lines in the palm of Lev's hand with a finger, still thinking about Lev's earlier sleep-addled comment. He shook Lev awake at their stop and led him back to their apartment by the hand. Lev clung to him again as he fumbled with the keys and unlocked the door. Once finally inside, Kenma tried to free himself, but Lev only held him tighter. Kenma sighed.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, you have to let go of me now,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Don't wanna."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"But you have to go to bed. And so do I, honestly," Kenma stifled a yawn. It wasn't that late, how was he so tired? It wasn't as though he'd played two intense matches in one day.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Sleep with me then," </p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma's heart skipped a beat. <em>Oh.</em></p>
</div><div>
  <p>"...Okay. But you still have to let me go so I can change,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"<em>Fiiiiiine</em>," Lev whined and released him, letting his arms dangle, and slowly plodded towards his room. Kenma rushed to his own bedroom, quickly stripped out of his clothes and put on the worn Nekoma t-shirt and gym shorts he currently called his night clothes, and headed across the hall, suddenly giddy despite having been exhausted just moments ago. Lev was laying in his bed, seemingly already asleep, his jersey abandoned on the floor but still wearing his sweatpants. The moment Kenma put his weight on the mattress, however, Lev opened his arms wide, eyes still closed. Kenma smiled and crawled onto the bed and into his embrace. Lev had quickly showered after the second match, and Kenma hummed happily at the scent of his cheap strawberry body wash. Lev placed a kiss on the top of his head.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Night," he said, and soon after fell asleep. Kenma lay awake a little longer, for once in his life not overthinking but instead taking in every detail he could of this moment in time, and finally following Lev to sleep.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>The next morning Kenma opened his eyes to see Lev staring back at him with a soft smile. He blinked.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Were you watching me sleep?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"That's kind of creepy," Kenma said, a joke which Lev didn't pick up on.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"No it's not!" He insisted, blushing. "At least, I don't think it is... were you creeped out? I'm sorry, you just looked so pretty and peaceful..."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Now it was Kenma's turn to blush. He looked away, burying his face in the crook of Lev's neck.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I was kidding, dummy," he mumbled, "And you can't just say things like that out of the blue."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Do you want me to stop?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>A pause.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"No."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>They lay there awhile, Lev idly tracing his hand along the curve of Kenma's spine under his shirt. Kenma's conversation with Kuro slowly came back to him slowly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, I'm sorry I never realized you had a crush on me in high school," He said quietly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"That's okay! I had a lot of crushes in high school!" Lev laughed, his bare chest under Kenma's hand vibrating with the sound of it. "Like, a lot. Too many. I couldn't make up my mind who to go after, so I just didn't do anything. I can't really blame you for not noticing a crush I never acted on, can I?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p><em>You acted on it more than you realize, and I still didn't notice it.</em> Kenma thought, but didn't say anything. <em>What a pair of dumb teens we were.</em></p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Why did that change after Russia?" Kenma asked.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Because I didn't have a crush on too many people anymore. Just you!" Lev explained, running his fingers through Kenma's hair, "It took me leaving to realize it, though. I missed you a lot, and it felt different from the way I would miss my parents, or Alisa, or even other people I crushed on, like when Tsukki and Hinata and Yachi-san left after training camps."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma had a flash of recognition at this description.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I felt that too," he said, pulling away from Lev's body slightly to look at his face.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Really? My cousin said that feeling was called 'тоска',"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Toska?" Kenma repeated.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah, it's a Russian word for... being really sad, or something like that. But it can also mean something like missing someone you really love. It sounded better when he explained it," Lev said with a little chuckle. "Actually, something he said kind of helped me work up the courage to do something about my crush on you,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What did he say?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I told him about missing you, and he explained to me about that 'тоска' thing, and the example he used was this guy he met at some gala and danced with all night and totally fell for, but then never saw again... and, I don't know, I didn't want to end up like that, I guess," Lev shrugged.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"We'll have to thank him for that, then," Kenma said with a small smile, "And Tobio, for putting his foot in his mouth. And Kuro, for making me work with you back in high school-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"At our wedding!" Lev interrupted, and Kenma flushed once again, brought his hands up to cover his face.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You can't just...! ... Lev, last night, you said you loved me... did you really mean that?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah! I mean, I've had years to think about it, so I'm pretty sure, at least! ... Why, do you... I mean, you don't have to-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I think I do," Kenma said softly, looking at Lev through his fingers. "I don't know if I can say it, yet, but I... yeah. I think I do, too."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Gently, wordlessly, Lev took Kenma's hands away from his face and kissed him, soft and slow. When they parted, he was smiling wide, his eyes sparkling. Kenma blinked, momentarily stunned. Finally he spoke:</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You know that one song you played for me, about who's in your heart now?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah?" Lev asks. Kenma wraps his arms around Lev's neck, pulls him close.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm going to hold on to love."</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading, and Happy Halloween! Notes for this chapter:<br/>
- While Hinata is the character who everyone crushes on, Lev is the character who crushes on EVERYONE. So if you've been keeping track up to this point, that includes Yaku, Taketora, Akaashi, Tsukishima, Hinata, AND Yachi as well as Kenma.<br/>
- By "Western virtual bands" I meant like, anything that can have a hologram concert (like Gorillaz and Studio Killers) becus its an easy jump from Vocaloid concerts to that. But really it was just an excuse to include a Studio Killers song &gt;:)</p><p>EDIT 11/17/20: this fic is now mirrored on <a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte-ch-2">my new fanfic website!</a> go check it out!</p><p>
  
</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. as the years go by, part one: i'll embrace past and coming days</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Summer 2017: With classes out, Lev and Kenma begin growing into their new relationship. Things are blissful, but there's more change on the horizon, and with it, growing anxieties.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter is just a lot of established relationship domestic fluff, which I had a TON of fun writing, with the setup for the actual crossover scenario coming at the very end. Enjoy!<br/>(Also again, pretty much the entire plot has been planned for years, which means I had no idea there would be a worldwide pandemic 8) so in this fic, 2020 precedes as it would have, which means no cancelled Olympics, etc.)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Exams came and went without much fanfare. The new term started, and Lev added a Russian class to his already-heavy course load. His arrival home late on Monday and Wednesday evenings would be Kenma's signal to go to bed as well - specifically, Lev's bed. He would lie down beside Lev, already half-asleep, and ask him what he learned in class, and Lev would mumble a new vocabulary word and its definition as he pulled Kenma close, after which they would both fall asleep.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p>Kenma's bed started to get less and less use, especially when summer came and the two men were no longer burdened by early morning classes or quite so many articles of clothing. Lev got a summer job at a pet supply store, fittingly, and came home one day with a little ginger kitten a customer had found on the street and was trying to find a home for.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I thought you'd kicked that habit of yours," Kenma sighed when Lev presented him with the tiny ball of fluff.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev pouted. "Please Kenma? He's so <em>small</em>. He's just so <em>little</em>." The kitten mewled endearingly as if Lev had cued it. Kenma had to admit, it was in fact so very tiny.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Okay, sure. Let's keep him," he said, scratching its head gently with a single finger. It closed its eyes in an expression of pure kitty bliss, and Kenma's heart melted. After some deliberation, they decided to name him Momo, for his orange fuzz. Lev had also grown much wiser since high school and had actually thought to bring home supplies he bought with his employee discount. Momo was skittish at first but adjusted incredibly quickly, and after only a week was already acting like he owned the place. <em>At least</em> someone <em>is using my bed</em>, Kenma thought to himself when he came home one day to find Momo curled up in a neat little ball of fur on one of his otherwise untouched pillows.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>With class out of session Kenma and Lev finally had the time to go on proper dates for the first time since they got together. Neither of them had ever gone out with someone before, so they took turns choosing things to do in order to figure out what they liked. One of Kenma's favorites was the day he picked an arcade and, instead of playing any games, Lev spent the whole time following Kenma and cheering him on.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Don't you want a turn?" Kenma asked.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I just like watching you play! You get this real intense look on your face, it's so cool! <em>You're</em> so cool, Kenma!" Lev answered loudly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>
    
  </p>
  <p>Kenma shrugged. "If you're sure," he said, turning back to the game with a smile and a blush. "Okay, if I can beat the high score, I'll treat us both to gelato afterwards,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>He accredited his high score to "KNL" and they left to get their reward, though not before stopping at a crane game so Kenma could win Lev a little Miku plush.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>However, as summer continued on, Kenma's happiness waned slightly at the thought of his impending graduation, hanging just above his head and casting a shadow over his day-to-day summer break life. He still hadn't made up his mind about what to do with, quite literally, the rest of his life after school. About a year ago he'd only wished for something that would let him continue living with Lev, and now they were actually together it seemed far more possible than Kenma's pining heart could've ever hoped for back then. Even so, the part of Kenma's mind ruled by worry and overthinking wondered if this could really last. What if Lev wouldn't want to continue living together after he graduated? Not that he could think of any concrete, believable reason Lev would think that way, but social anxiety was rarely rational like that.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>The thought continued to trouble him as school started back again, plaguing his mind as he tried to write his thesis or distracting him while cooking, causing him to burn their dinner and have to start all over again. He found reassurance in Lev's arms, in his smiles and kisses and his fingers interlaced with Kenma's own, but it even then he was never able to keep his fears at bay permanently. After a while of stewing Kenma realized that searching Lev's actions for some hidden answer to an unasked question would never be enough, and it would be far better to just hear it from his lips. Having learned from the earlier drama of their getting together, he decided to just come out with it one night during winter break. They were on the couch, Kenma in Lev's lap and Momo in Kenma's. Lev's head rested on Kenma's shoulder as he played Project Mirai DX, which Kenma had bought for him when he saw it while visiting Kenma at work one day. ("They make Miku video games!?" Lev asked with incredulity, eyes sparkling excitedly, and Kenma knew then he had to buy it. At least he got an employee discount...) Kenma idly scratched under Momo's chin and behind his ears as he quietly hummed along to <a href="https://youtu.be/kZfCbPKdlhg">the song</a>, the easiest track in the game and Lev's favorite.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I want to laugh with you forever like this," Miku's voice urged him sweetly. He took a deep breath and dove in.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, after I graduate, I can... still keep living with you here, right?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Huh? Oh crap-" Lev cursed, having missed a note.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You're not gonna kick me out after I graduate? You're okay with me staying?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Of course not! Did you really think I would?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Kind of? Not really, but... I don't know, it was a thought that was bugging me. I just figured I'd just ask so I could hear it from you that you wouldn't,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I wouldn't do that, I love you, Kenma!" Lev insisted as he held the last note, finishing the song with a B+. "I mean, I couldn't afford this place on my own anyway. And what would we do with Momo then?" Kenma laughed at this.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You're right, I knew I was worried for nothing," he said, turning his head to awkwardly place a kiss on Lev's cheek, "But thank you for indulging me anyway,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Anything for you, Kenma!" Lev replied, setting Kenma's DS aside to wrap his arms tight around Kenma's waist, "If you're ever worried about anything, I'm here for you, okay?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah," Kenma answered softly, taking one of Lev's hands in his own.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma was far less troubled after that. Just hearing the sincerity in Lev's voice when he told Kenma he loved him, his blunt honesty about the financial aspect of the situation and his pure-hearted worry over the fate of their cat, was enough to do away with any concerns Kenma still had.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma's final term passed by in a whirlwind of graduation preparation, job hunting, and fielding congratulations from relatives. Before long he found himself seated at a fancy restaurant surrounded by family and friends, a diploma in one hand and the other held tightly in Lev's. Though his parents remembered Lev from high school, it was now Kenma's turn to announce to a table full of people, "Everyone, look, this is my boyfriend, Lev."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Only a few weeks later Kenma started his new job as a "junior data analyst" for a large investment firm. It wasn't a glamorous job at all, mostly consisting of reviewing reports and tracking data entry, but while some might've felt unfulfilled sitting at a computer all day, Kenma didn't mind. He earned enough at his desk job to pay rent, put food on the table, and fund his hobby, and for him, that was enough. And most important of all, he was able to continue living with Lev. In a lot of ways, it was like nothing had changed. They still went on arcade dates on the weekends, still played volleyball with Tobio and Shouyou and Takanobu (who had also graduated and was now taking graduate courses to become a physical therapist), as well as Yuu, another friend of Shouyou's who had just joined Team Japan after returning from a four-year-long round-the-world trip. They still did their grocery shopping together, watched scary movies in the pitch dark with their hands clasped tightly together in fear, and argued about if Miku's or Luka's version of "Romeo and Cinderella" was better without ever managing to change the other's mind.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>But other things took some getting used to. Momo grew from a kitten into his awkward teenage stage and discovered just how ear-shatteringly loudly he could yowl, becoming the cause of much lost sleep for the two men. Kenma stopped bleaching his hair, feeling self-conscious about how badly the unnatural color stood out in his somewhat conservative workplace. He felt strange about having lost the signature "pudding head" look that had defined him to others since high school, but all it took was Lev saying he liked it for Kenma to regain his confidence in the decision. Most notably, working full-time left Kenma exhausted most weekdays. Lev was supportive, of course, meeting Kenma at the train station on evenings when he didn't have class and offering to carry his bag for him, letting Kenma collapse on him as soon as they got back to the apartment. As much as things changed, they always ended up snuggled close in Lev's bed each night, and for that Kenma was endlessly grateful.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Summer came and went uneventfully to make way for fall. Lev somehow got really into a Korean girl group that had debuted in the late August, which Kenma discovered when he came home to find Lev pacing and studying to a song called <a href="https://youtu.be/BVVfMFS3mgc">"Heart Attack"</a> played on loop instead of his usual playlist.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>("You would look so cute in this outfit!" He said, pointing at one of the girls in <a href="https://youtu.be/ZNcBZM5SvbY">a different music video</a>, "and see, I'd be the guy playing DDR!"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Lev, you're terrible at DDR," Kenma reminded him.)</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Lev's Russian slowly got better - instead of a single new vocabulary word as they went to bed, Lev would mumble a phrase or even a whole sentence, often falling asleep before managing to translate it for Kenma's benefit. One night in the dead of winter, as they snuggled close under several layers of blankets to stay warm, Lev whispered his newest phrase: "Я люблю тебя всем сердцем,"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"What does that mean?" Kenma dutifully asked him through a yawn.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I love you from the bottom of my heart," Lev answered, placing a kiss to the top of Kenma's head and falling asleep. Kenma's heart fluttered, warmth spreading to every inch of his body and banishing the cold still tinging his fingers and nose. He wrapped his arms tighter around Lev's body, nuzzling closer into the space under his chin, and was soon asleep as well.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Spring came, and with it Lev's final spring tournament, as he had decided earlier in the year to quit the team and focus more on his studies for the last two years of his program. Unfortunately, Kenma was unable to make it to any of the preliminary matches due to work, and UTokyo ended up losing in the quarterfinals.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"See? It's all because you weren't there to cheer for me, I'm sure of it!" Lev whined from the shower.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"I'm sorry," Kenma yelled back from Lev's room, where he lay on the bed playing Let's Go Pikachu, "Is there some way I can make it up to you?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"No, it's okay..." Lev said sadly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Are you sure? I can think of a few things that might make you feel better..." Kenma said with a coy edge to his voice. Lev poked his head out from behind the shower curtain.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma wordlessly glanced up from his game, gave him a meaningful look. Lev grinned.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Let me just dry off real quick-"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"No need, I'll join you," Kenma said with a smile, setting down his Switch and pulling off his shirt as he headed into the bathroom. Lev's mood saw a vast improvement, much to Kenma's relief.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>Spring term ended and summer began. Kenma and Lev saw Promare together a total of ten times, while Lev saw it two times more without him (once with Alisa and once alone on his day off while Kenma was at work). Volleyball with Shouyou, Tobio and Yuu became infrequent as the national team started to gear up for Tokyo 2020. Japan was already pre-qualified as the hosting team, but this was no excuse to slack off, of course. Lev and Kenma were invited to attend a practice, and were astounded, both by the level of play and by how hard all the players were working themselves. Even Shouyou, whose incredible stamina had only improved since high school, appeared to be reaching his limit by the time Takanobu arrived in the late afternoon to pick up him, Tobio and Yuu.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"They all passed out on the train once and ended up lost, so now I drive them home," Takanobu explained with a small smile, his arm around Shouyou's shoulders as the smaller man leaned on him, "Better that he fall asleep somewhere I can keep an eye on him."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Takaaaaaa, you're embarrassing me," Shouyou whined, "I'm <em>Japan</em> now, people can't know I'm really all <em>bwuh</em>, y'know?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You're not <em>bwuh</em>, Hinata! You're just tired, that's natural! All you need is a nap and you'll be back to <em>ba-bam</em> by tomorrow!" Lev said enthusiastically. Kenma and Takanobu exchanged a glance.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Haiba, be quiet," Tobio commanded through a yawn, trudging behind with Yuu clinging to his arm. After a moment, he added, "Please."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Fall came, and Kenma was, for reasons unknown to even himself, possessed to make a Twitter account for Momo, now a full-grown cat. It quickly amassed a modestly large following of 10K after getting retweeted by both Shouyou and Lev's cousin and subsequently several more world-class athletes and fans. Kenma was surprised to find that he wasn't particularly overwhelmed by this, even when he started getting replies in languages other than Japanese and English. Something about the abstraction of it being "Momo's" account rather than his own gave him confidence, and he even felt comfortable enough to post a picture of himself for some curious followers, though he still covered his face with a laughing cat emoji. </p>
</div><div>
  <p>Project DIVA Mega Mix came out right around the time of Lev and Kenma's third "anniversary," and to their amusement they discovered they both had planned to get it as a surprise gift for the other. One of the copies was returned and the refund became the start of their Russia vacation fund instead. With Lev's encouragement, Kenma made it through the whole track list of 101 songs in one weekend, for no other reason than to prove that he could. Lev was saddened to discover that his favorite track from Project Mirai was cut, and decided he would simply have to play through them all himself to choose his new favorite. They also discovered that by detaching the Joycons they could effectively make it a two-player mode; not one they were very good at, mind you, but that was part of the enjoyment.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>However, their video game time was cut short when spring term started, and with it, Lev's sixth and final year of his veterinary program. His course load was worse than ever, leaving him little free time to spend with Kenma. And Kenma, now left alone with his thoughts more than he'd grown used to, was beginning to feel a vague, nameless anxiety in the pit of his stomach.</p>
</div><div>
  <hr/>
</div><div>
  <p>It wasn't quite the same as when Kenma himself had been graduating. Back then his relationship with Lev was still new, and he was afraid that even the smallest change to their lives would shatter his happiness. He knew better now - three years of holding Lev's hand, of falling asleep in his arms every night, had proved to Kenma it would take a lot more than a diploma to break them apart. But even still, he couldn't shake the fear that things might somehow, beyond logic, take a turn for the worse. He really thought he'd been getting better at dealing with change, but apparently, (and the irony of it was not lost on him,) a lot about him had stayed the same.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Summer break allowed Lev the space breathe again, and between that and the 2020 Olympics, Kenma was able to keep his anxieties about the future at bay for a blissful few months. Rather than a watch party at Takanobu's apartment like four years previously, Kenma found himself in the stands of Musashino Forest Sports Plaza cheering for Team Japan along with Lev and countless old friends from their high school volleyball days. Kenma didn't think he'd ever shouted so much in his whole life, and yet even when his voice was hoarse and his throat was so sore it hurt to breathe, he continued to yell, because he felt as though his chest might burst from the excitement otherwise. There wasn't a single dry eye among the group when Japan won the gold, teammates and rivals alike embracing each other in a frenzy of overwhelming emotion and pride. Kenma threw his arms around Lev's neck, who in turn picked him up off the ground entirely, both of them laughing and crying and so full of love and joy they couldn't speak, and so kissed instead. Even from the stands Kenma could make out Shouyou, Tobio and Yuu sobbing as the medals were awarded. The tears didn't abate until long after Kimigayo had ended.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>It took several weeks for the high of Tokyo 2020 to leave, but when it did and school started back again, Kenma found his anxiety was still very much there, now even worse than before, and just as hard to explain. Logically, he knew he and Lev could weather whatever the future brought, but convincing his own stubborn brain of it was another matter entirely. The feeling settled into him like when Momo would join him in Lev in bed, nestling into a space in his chest and refusing to move, leaving Kenma to carry the dark and heavy unease with him at all times. It continued all through the fall and into the winter, and with the usual seasonal depression on top of it, Kenma had become more subdued than he'd been in years. And though he tried to hide it, he could tell Lev was taking notice, from the way he would hold Kenma just a little longer when they said goodbye in the mornings, or how he gently cupped Kenma's face when they kissed, like Kenma was suddenly something fragile and he wanted to convey that he understood without words. Of course, he didn't understand Kenma's feelings, not entirely. When simple affection didn't have the desired effect, Lev tried cheering Kenma up in other ways, like taking him to his favorite bakery for apple pie, or plying him with brand-new games. Kenma appreciated these gestures, and because of the thought behind them he loved them more than Lev even realized, but for some reason it still wasn't enough to shake away Kenma's melancholy, which only made Lev try harder the next time.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma knew he should just talk to Lev about what he was feeling, and he wished he could, but even that instinct was clouded by doubt. He worried that telling Lev he was afraid he might leave even though Kenma <em>knew</em> he wouldn't would make Lev think Kenma didn't trust him. His different anxieties wrapped around each other, snowballing into something even bigger and harder to deal with - so he didn't. He continued to suffer silently, figuring he could just hold off until Lev's graduation, at which point the issue would resolve itself one way or the other. He only hoped Lev's attempts to improve his mood wouldn't become too drastic.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>And then, around Christmas, they became too drastic.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma came home from work in the evening, all ready to collapse on the couch with a game and remain there until bedtime, when he was ambushed by Lev at the door.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Kenma! Guess what!" He began enthusiastically, arms spread wide in excitement. His path to the couch blocked, Kenma collapsed against Lev's chest instead, Lev immediately wrapping his arms around him.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Tired-" he began, but apparently Lev didn't want to wait for guesses (or excuses).</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"We're going to the National Ice Skating Championships!" </p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma stared up at his grinning face with confusion and more than a little apathy.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Why?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"You know my cousin, Victor? The ice skater?" Lev asked, backing up slightly so Kenma could close the door behind him while remaining in his arms.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Yeah, but he's Russian though, right?"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"He is, yeah, but his husband is a skater too, and he's Japanese, so he's competing!" The word 'husband' struck Kenma for some reason, but he said nothing. He pried himself out of Lev's embrace to put his bag down and take off his shoes, but Lev kept an arm around his shoulders. "Victor doesn't usually come to the Japanese championships, because he's busy with his own stuff in Russia I guess, but he's here this year. And he got two spectator tickets!"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Two?" Kenma repeated, leaning his head on Lev's shoulder as they head back into the apartment.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"One for me, and the other was supposed to be for Alisa actually, but it turns out she can't make it because of work, so it's perfect!"</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Perfect, huh..." To Kenma, it sounded far from perfect. This was exactly what he had been worried about - Lev going way too far to make Kenma feel better, only to once again be let down. What if Lev gave up after this, gave up on him? Lev must've sensed the hesitation in his voice, because he added a small "Kenma, please?" as Kenma's pace slowed to think.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>No, Kenma thought, it would only make it worse if he refused. At least Lev hadn't spent any money this time, and after the Olympics Kenma felt much more confident in his ability to handle being in sporting crowds. He was also interested to finally meet the famed cousin Victor, and now his husband, too... maybe it wouldn't be so bad.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma stood on his tiptoes and placed a kiss to Lev's cheek.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Let's go. It'll be nice."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Great!" Lev replied, sitting down on the couch and pulling Kenma along into his lap. "Just, uh, don't tell Alisa I said it was perfect that she couldn't come," He added sheepishly.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>In spite of his mood, Kenma had to laugh.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"No promises," he said slyly. Lev pouted, nuzzled his head into Kenma's shoulder.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Kenmaaaaaa, please, she'll kill me!" he whined. Kenma laughed again. He couldn't help it - Lev was too cute.</p>
</div><div>
  <p>"Okay, okay, I won't tell her, I promise." Kenma kissed the side of Lev's head, still pressed into his shoulder, then reached over to grab his Switch. "Now pick a game for me to play, I'm too exhausted to decide myself."</p>
</div><div>
  <p>Kenma ended up continuing his Pokemon Sword nuzlocke run for a few hours, Lev watching over his shoulder and providing support and suggestions as always, until neither of them could keep their eyes open any longer and they went to bed. As Kenma drifted to sleep, Lev's breaths soft and regular on the back of his neck, he realized the anxieties weighing on his mind felt just a little lighter now.</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! Notes for this chapter:<br/>
- Yes that's an actual illustration by sensei! I've always loved the idea of an arcade date for them going exactly like that, based on that image, so I'm glad I finally got to write it :D<br/>
- Kenma is a math major mostly because of the "applepi" thing but also because we need more gays who are good at math representation. /hj<br/>
- Noya being on the National Team is based on a promo sensei did for the Olympics of him, Kags and Hinata playing alongside some of the irl National Team.<br/>
- Lev is an Orbit. His bias is JinSoul. &gt;:)</p><p>Thanks to the Lev Weekend people for letting me include my fic in their event! This is the last update I'll be posting until Christmas Eve so I hope you'll come back then!<br/>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>EDIT 11/17/20: this fic is now mirrored on <a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte-ch-3">my new fanfic website!</a> go check it out!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. oh my love, my love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Christmas Eve 2020: Somehow Kenma winds up in the stands of the National Ice Skating Championships with Lev. They see several amazing programs, learn more about the sport, and finally, they get to see Katsuki Yuri - and Kenma finds himself moved deeply by his performance.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>so originally i was gonna wait until christmas eve in real life to post this chapter but with the ice adolescence hype i thought, why not now? especially since this is the first chapter any yoi characters actually appear. please enjoy!!</p><p>(but seriously HOW GREAT IS VICTOR'S NEW OUTFIT)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="font_7">The Japanese Figure Skating Championships for the 2020-21 season was to end on Christmas eve with the senior men's free skate program. All the senior events were held at Musashino Forest Sports Plaza, the same locale the Olympic volleyball competition had taken place just months ago. In high school Kenma never would have imagined he would ever return to the grand building as a spectator, and twice in one year, no less. Yet here he finds himself, seated in the stands, hugging his knees to his chest and shivering even despite his scarf and his favorite thick winter coat, the nice gray one with the fake fur around the hood. When he'd agreed to come with Lev to the event he'd forgotten to take into account how severely the freezing temperatures would affect his enjoyment. In his own defense, he'd been tired from work and anxious about the state of his relationship when he'd agreed, but those facts offered him little comfort as he blows into his bare hands and rubbs them together, trying to bring some warmth to his fingers already growing numb. (He swore he'd left his gloves in the inner pocket...)</p><p class="font_7">Though, when he sees Lev returning to their seats with two hot chocolates, he did feel a little warmer. (In his heart, anyway. His digits still felt frozen solid.)</p><p class="font_7">"I got us programs," Lev says, turning so that Kenma could grab them from his back pocket before sitting down with the drinks. Kenma takes one of the programs and traded the other to Lev for the hot chocolate, which he clings to gratefully, allowing the warmth from the little paper cup and its steaming contents to bring some feeling back into his hands.</p><p class="font_7">"Thanks," Kenma mutters before carefully taking a sip. Lev starts looking through the program as he sipped his own drink.</p><p class="font_7">"Mm!" he hums into his cup, pointing at something on one of the pages.</p><p class="font_7">"What is it?" Kenma leans over to get a better look at what had caught his attention.</p><p class="font_7">"That's him!" Lev says after swallowing his mouthful. "Victor's husband - Katsuki Yuri."</p><p class="font_7">The program has a small bio for each of the competitors along with a summary of their career accomplishments, which Kenma scans.</p><p class="font_7">"Katsuki Yuri was born and raised in Saga prefecture, where his family owns a hot springs... has been skating his whole life... competed in PyeongChang in 2018..."</p><p class="font_7">There is a photo alongside the text, a headshot of a man with slicked black hair, smiling with his arms triumphantly outstretched.</p><p class="font_7">"He's handsome," Kenma comments.</p><p class="font_7">"Right?" Lev agrees. "Victor really got lucky w-"</p><p class="font_7">"A reminder to all patrons, if you were not here with us for the men's short program, the scores can be found in the back of your programs." An announcement over the sound system interrupts Lev, accompanied by the same information displayed on the two screens on either end of the stadium. </p><p class="font_7">"I don't really understand how this all works," Lev says as he turned to the back of the program, the previous topic of Katsuki's good looks now forgotten, "Look, he placed fourth in the short program. That's too bad,"</p><p class="font_7">"Does that mean he can't win a medal now?" Kenma asks. Lev shrugs with an 'I don't know' noise.</p><p class="font_7">"Actually, he still has a chance to make podium if he does well today," says a voice from behind them. Kenma and Lev turned in their seats to see a young girl, probably middle-school aged. "Sorry, I shouldn't have eavesdropped..." she adds sheepishly. "But the way it works is, the scores from the short program and the free skate are added together to get the final result! And the winners are determined from there,"</p><p class="font_7">"Oh, I see!" Lev says enthusiastically, "So if he does well enough today, his overall score could still be good enough to get third place or better?"</p><p class="font_7">"Yes, exactly!" she says with a smile.</p><p class="font_7">"That's my Riine-chan!" says the woman seated next to her, "She knows everything there is to know about skating!"</p><p class="font_7">"Moooom..." Riine whines, her face turning red.</p><p class="font_7">"Nice to meet you Riine-chan! I'm Lev, and this is Kenma!"</p><p class="font_7">"Lev-san! Kenma-san! Nice to meet you!" Riine says, inclining her head to both of them. "Have you been to figure skating competitions before?"</p><p class="font_7">"Nope, this is our first time," Kenma answers.</p><p class="font_7">"Well, if you have any other questions, you can ask me!" </p><p class="font_7">"I have another question actually!" Lev says, raising his hand as though he was in a lecture. "How does the scoring work? Since there aren't goals or baskets or whatever,"</p><p class="font_7">"Oh! That's a good one!" Riine says, her eyes sparkling with excitement. Kenma got the impression that it wasn't often she met people who actually seemed interested in her hobby. "It's really complicated, actually! But basically, there are two parts to the scoring: the technical elements, and the program components. The technical elements score is based on how hard the various components are and how well they're executed, while the program components score is judged on things like performance and interpretation of the music."</p><p class="font_7">"So it's entirely subjective?" Lev asks.</p><p class="font_7">"Yes! Well, actually, some things will automatically gain or lose you points, like a fall is an automatic one-point deduction, or a jump completed in the last half is an automatic bonus." Riine clarifies. "But yes, for the most part, it's based on the judges' scoring."</p><p class="font_7">"Sounds really hard for fans to keep track of all that," Kenma comments.</p><p class="font_7">Riine nods. "Yeah, it is! I'm getting better at it though," She says with a look of determination, "But sometimes I'd rather just enjoy the performance, you know? Speaking of which," She points down at the rink, where a man in a sparkly green costume has appeared on the ice and people began to cheer and chatter excitedly as they too took notice. "It's about to start!"</p><p class="font_7">Skater after skater takes their turn on the ice, and Riine continues to provide commentary in a hushed tone as the athletes gracefully glide and spin on the ice. Lev audibly gasps with awe at every jump, inhaling sharply with a grimace and clutching tighter at Kenma's arm whenever a skater took a tumble. ("Do you think ice is harder than a gym floor?" he asks in a whisper, to which Kenma replies, "Well, it's certainly wetter and colder.")</p><p class="font_7">Though each competitor is impressive to Kenma's untrained eye, there are a few skaters in particular who stand out to him. There is one man dressed in a sparkly black and orange number with a bright red streak in his blond hair who gets the whole crowd clapping along to <a href="https://youtu.be/SSyotDF2ClA">his upbeat and cheery choice of music</a>, Kenma included. Something about him gives Kenma a strange sense of deja vu despite having never seen him before. Lev agrees that he was somehow familiar, but neither of them can place exactly what it was before his performance ends. Kenma takes a picture of his bio in the program in order to look him up later.</p><p class="font_7">Another skater, a high-school aged boy in an extravagant flowing white and green outfit, gets the most applause and cheers of any competitor, including a coordinated cheer by a group of other students led by a pink-haired woman with a baby strapped to her chest. After doing some swooning herself, a red-faced Riine explains that he was a fan-favorite dubbed the "Prince of Skating" after having never placing lower than first in the juniors and as such had amassed a number of fans.</p><p class="font_7">"This season is his senior debut, so a lot of people came out to support him! That's actually the number one reason I'm here as well," she finishes sheepishly. Kenma offers her a small smile.</p><p class="font_7">About a minute into his elegant and utterly perfect performance, set to <a href="https://youtu.be/EikJdSBhtt4">a worshipful English song with a beautiful piano accompaniment</a>, Lev suddenly speaks up.</p><p class="font_7">"I got it!" He says a little too loud, and is immediately shushed by someone nearby.</p><p class="font_7">"Got what?" Kenma whispers, unable to take his eyes off the performance.</p><p class="font_7">"I thought I recognized one of the singer's voices, and I just figured out who it is!" Lev replies, more quietly this time, opening up the program. "Tategami Aoi! It is her!"</p><p class="font_7">"How do you know her?" Kenma asks.</p><p class="font_7">"She's the lead singer of Wild Azur! They're a rock band, though, this is a weird thing for her to collaborate on..."</p><p class="font_7">"You know, apparently this song was recorded specifically for his performance!" Riine tells them quietly. "That's how cool he is!"</p><p class="font_7">"He must have serious connections..." Lev agrees.</p><p class="font_7">As it turns out, Katsuki is the very next competitor. He takes the ice to moderate applause, dressed in black pants with a loose white top, a red belt tied around the waist, with black and red accents swirling across the chest and shoulders. Similar to his picture in the program, his arms are proudly outstretched, and even from the stands, Kenma can make out his confident grin.</p><p class="font_7">Kenma glances over at Lev, who is smiling wide, watching as Katsuki took his starting position. Kenma smiles at this. Then, he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns his head to see Riine leaning forward to look at him.</p><p class="font_7">"Kenma-san? Is Katsuki the reason you and Lev-san are here?"</p><p class="font_7">Kenma nods. "Katsuki is married to Lev's cousin, but this is the first time we've been able to see him skate in person, so Lev is very excited."</p><p class="font_7">"Really? That's so cool!" she says. "I'm glad he's here to see it! Ah, it's starting,"</p><p class="font_7"><a href="https://youtu.be/0ImSOSvJHG0">The song begins</a> with the sound of a synth organ playing a single chord in a slow staccato rhythm and a woman softly singing in English. Katsuki raises his arms, gliding backwards, his eyes fixed on a point above the rink. He clings to himself tenderly as he moves swiftly across the ice, the drama of the song and his movements combined giving Kenma the impression of a dark supernatural love story. (He thinks he may recognize the singer's voice, but is too transfixed by the performance to check his program.) A lower harmony comes in under the repeated chord during the second verse, Katsuki tracing large arcs against the edge of the space with one leg extended behind him. He returns to the center of the rink, spinning rapidly in place as the organ notes descend lower and a drum beat begins -</p><p class="font_7">And suddenly the tone of the song shifts. Triumphant violins sound out above the drums as Katsuki takes off across the ice, performing the first jump of his program in time with a high flourish of notes and landing it beautifully. But Kenma is distracted from the performance by the lyrics of the song, which have shifted now from English to Japanese:</p><p class="font_7">手を取り合って　このまま行こう (<em>Hand in hand, let us go,</em>)<br/>
愛する人よ (<em>My beloved.</em>)<br/>
静かな宵に (<em>On a quiet evening,</em>)<br/>
光を灯し (<em>We will light the flame,</em>)<br/>
愛しき教えを抱き (<em>And embrace lessons lovingly taught.</em>)</p><p class="font_7">Kenma is suddenly acutely aware of Lev's hand holding his own, their fingers intertwined, a feeling of warmth reaching up Kenma's arm and spreading to his whole body. He wonders if Lev is experiencing the same electrifying sensation as he is, but doesn't dare turn his head, as though the connection might be broken if he moves a single muscle.</p><p class="font_7">Kenma remains paralyzed this way as Katsuki's program continues. The song returns to the darker melody and English lyrics with the addition of a guitar skillfully being plucked, adding a wistfulness to the performance that is only amplified by the way Katsuki outstretches his arms, seeming to grasp at something that is no longer there. The chorus repeats, the lead singer now accompanied by several quieter voices singing a harmony, and Kenma's pulse races at hearing the lyrics again. Katsuki performs his second jump, but unfortunately does not land it this time, though he recovers quickly. The chorus transitions directly to a bridge, in which the lines are sung alternatingly by the lead singer and the choir, Katsuki executing several smaller jumps in time with the lyrics before performing an extended spin in the center of the rink. As the singer finishes the last line of the bridge and the final violin note fades in the air, Katsuki also pauses, and for a split second Kenma can see his expression: serene, content. Loving.</p><p class="font_7">The strings and drums burst back to life as the chorus repeats again, this time in English:</p><p class="font_7">
  <em>Let us cling together as the years go by,</em><br/>
<em>Oh, my love, my love.</em><br/>
<em>In the quiet of the night,</em><br/>
<em>Let our candle always burn,</em><br/>
<em>Let us never lose the lessons we have learned.</em>
</p><p class="font_7">Katsuki surges across the ice in great arcs, performing two more jumps in quick succession and once again failing to land properly. It takes him slightly longer to get up this time, Kenma instinctively tightening his grip on Lev's hand as he struggles to get back on two feet; But as the chorus repeats in Japanese once more with the addition of a children's choir, he completes one last jump, though he doesn't achieve as much height. As the tempo of the song slows he outstretches his arms, once again frozen in a moment of tranquility, before crossing his arms over his chest and gliding backwards as the last line is sung. He completes one final spin as the song winds down, reduced to just the guitar and a single violin as the singer hums the last few notes, and ends his program posed with one hand over his heart and the other extended to one side in the direction he is looking. As the crowd cheers and applauds, Kenma follows the direction of his arm all the way to the kiss and cry, where he notices for the first time a man with hair a familiar shade of gray waving, whistling and blowing kisses to Katsuki.</p><p class="font_7">Suddenly Lev releases Kenma's hand, bringing him back to reality. Coming out of his daze, he smiles a little as Lev stands and throws the gift he bought onto the ice, a plush lion with a red ribbon around its neck. Though the sweepers take care of the other few gifts, the lion lands near enough to Katsuki that he grabs it himself, waving in the general direction it came from with a smile, and Lev waves back. As he sits back down again, Kenma taps on his shoulder.</p><p class="font_7">"That's him?" he asks, and points to the gray-haired man. Lev glances over, then looks back at Kenma and nods.</p><p class="font_7">"Yup! That's Cousin Victor!"</p><p class="font_7">As Kenma watches Katsuki step off the ice and into Cousin Victor's embrace, he recalls the powerful feelings of affection that overcame him during the performance. He feels the need to say something about it, to say anything.</p><p class="font_7">"Hey Lev..." he begins, but when Lev turns back to him, his shining green eyes meeting Kenma's own, he suddenly loses the courage.</p><p class="font_7">"What is it?"</p><p class="font_7">Kenma closes his mouth, opens it, closes it again, then shakes his head.</p><p class="font_7">"Nevermind. It's nothing."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! Notes on this chapter:<br/>
- i created Riine so that Kenma and Lev, who know nothing about skating, would have a somewhat better idea of whats going on (because what's more haikyuu-core than a random fan explaining sports rules to the uninitiated and the reader?) but the truth is i don't know anything about skating either so i just tried my best with what the internet told me qwq<br/>
- for the description of yuri's performance i tried to be as vague as possible while still describing the entirety of it becus again, idk what im doing here lol<br/>
- i HAD to include minami becus he's my absolute favorite yoi character... my wonderful ketchup and mustard skate son. i chose that particular song for him becus i really loved hearing it when i first bought the history maker album and it seemed to fit him well<br/>
- the other competitor mentioned is a PreCure character who is a skater in the show, i couldnt resist mixing him into the crossover as well, especially because he is openly GNC, the first official male Cure, and one of the very few explicitly mlm characters in all of PreCure. i plan to write a oneshot as part of QHMaOSI about nationals from his point of view. Tategami Aoi whose voice Lev recognizes in the music is also a PreCure character, as is the pink-haired woman and her baby. the song is one i actually sung myself in my college choir, it made me think of him (and also of victuuri :3) from the first time we rehearsed. and it turns out it was actually written for the LGBT community, so it's perfect! <a href="https://www.joanszymko.com/works/ind/arise-my-love">you can read more about Arise My Love here :D</a></p><p>okay NOW im hiatusing again until christmas eve. see ya then! (<a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte-ch-4">mirrored on my fanfic website</a>)</p><p>
  
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        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. in the quiet of the night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After the competition, Kenma is finally introduced to Cousin Victor and Katsuki Yuri. The four men go out to dinner along with another skater, Minami Kenjirou. Towards the end of the night, Yuri shares a secret with Kenma.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Merry Christmas and happy victor's birthday! this is the first chapter where there's more than one language being spoken, so english will be in "" quotes while japanese will be in「」quotes. there's some russian too but since its kenma's pov and he doesnt know any russian, its still in cyrillic. and since I don't know russian i just used google translate lol so i apologize if its rough.</p><p>please enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div class=""><p class="font_7">Katsuki ends up winning the bronze medal, silver having gone to the skater Kenma found familiar (though he still couldn't place why), and the so-called "Prince of Skating" living up to his moniker and taking the gold, much to the delight of Riine and his many other fans in the audience. (The same pink-haired mother leads her gaggle of students in another cheer, first for "Wakamiya-kun" and then for "everybody," spectators apparently included.)</p><p class="font_7">After the ceremonies people begin to grab their belongings and slowly shuffle out the doors, back into the lobby. The two men bid farewell to Riine and her mother, giving the mom the address of their apartment in case Riine ever felt like writing them a letter.</p><p class="font_7">「Thank you for listening to me,」 Riine says quietly, avoiding eye contact.</p><p class="font_7">「Thank you for teaching us!」 Lev answers with a grin.</p><p class="font_7">「We would've been really confused if we didn't have you to explain things for us,」 Kenma adds.</p><p class="font_7">「Instead, we were only a little bit confused!」 Lev finishes. Riine laughs.</p><p class="font_7">Her mother inclines her head to both of them.</p><p class="font_7">「Really, thank you both,」 she tells them sincerely, 「Take care,」</p><p class="font_7">「You too,」 Kenma replies with a slight bow back.</p><p class="font_7">「Bye!」 Riine waves back as they left, leaving Kenma and Lev both smiling with a sense of joy even after they'd disappeared out the door.</p><p class="font_7">Lev then gravitates towards where the Skating Federation is selling souvenir t-shirts and other such fare.</p><p class="font_7">「The skaters probably take a little while to come out from backstage anyway - like when we saw Fukunaga's comedy show, remember?」 Lev says as they inch forward in the line that has formed in front of the merchandise tables.「There's time, don't worry. I just want something to remember the day we met Katsuki!」</p><p class="font_7">With their shirts purchased (Lev had insisted Kenma needed to have one too), they finally start making their way towards the competitors' entrance, down a long hallway off to one side of the lobby. The hallway is populated by other skaters and their coaches, friends, and family gathering in little clumps to congratulate or commiserate, as the case may be. Lev's height is an enormous help in situations like these, and he scans over the heads of the people standing about, searching for either Katsuki or Cousin Victor, Kenma holding his hand again as they slowly make their way along.</p><p class="font_7">「Ah! I see them!」 Lev finally shouts. Looking in the direction he immediately points, Kenma sees Katsuki and Cousin Victor through a gap between two clusters of people, conversing with Wakamiya, the "Prince." Lev drops Kenma's hand, raises both hands to his mouth, and, much to Kenma's dismay, shouts-</p><p class="font_7">«<em>VITYA!</em>»</p><p class="font_7">The shout causes Victor to look up, along with Katsuki, Wakamiya, and several others in the hallway. Instantly the older man's face lights up, and he raises his arms wide.</p><p class="font_7">«<em>LYOVOCHKA!</em>» Maybe it was due to the enclosed space, or Kenma's growing embarrassment, but he thinks Victor could rival Alisa for volume.</p><p class="font_7">Victor quickly makes his way over, followed more slowly by Katsuki after he offers what Kenma assumes is an apology to Wakamiya for their conversation being cut short.</p><p class="font_7">«Lyovochka! Kotik!» Victor continues loudly as the two cousins embraced, Kenma taking a step back to give them a little more space. Seeing Victor up close, Kenma is struck by the strong family resemblance - though Victor is not as tall as Lev, and the color of his eyes is closer to Alisa's piercing blue than to Lev's sparkling green, they have more features in common than not; most notably, Kenma thinks, the same wide, infectious grins. 「It's good to see you! You look well! Have you grown?」</p><p class="font_7">«полсантиметра!» Lev answered, resting a hand flat on his head. «твой японский очень хорошо звучит, кузен!»</p><p class="font_7">«честно говоря, над вашим произношением можно поработать.» Whatever Victor said makes Lev visibly deflate, and Kenma is about to move to comfort him until he added, «но даже в этом случае ты быстро учишься!» which causes him to perk back up again with a confident smile.</p><p class="font_7">At this time, Katsuki appears at Victor's side, and Victor circles an arm around his waist, pulling him close. "It is my pleasure to introduce to you to the love of my life, my sun and stars, my beautiful, talented, beloved husband, Katsuki Yuri."</p><p class="font_7">「Good to meet you,」Katsuki says, his cheeks dusted with pink, as he bows first to Lev and then Kenma, who reply the same as they bow back.</p><p class="font_7">"And I would like you to meet my... ah, my..." Lev gestures to Kenma, and gestures again, and Kenma understands that Lev is unsure what the proper term for their relationship would be in English.</p><p class="font_7">"Kenma. Kozume Kenma," He simply gives his name instead, inclining his head to the other two men.</p><p class="font_7">"Yes, my Kenma!" Lev exclaims, and Kenma blushedsat his use of the possessive. With a small chuckle, Katsuki returns the gesture, while Victor also offers his hand to shake, which Kenma did.</p><p class="font_7">「I've really been looking forward to this, Lev! I've heard a lot about you from Victor,」Katsuki says with a warm smile.</p><p class="font_7">「I could say the same to you,」Lev replies,「But, um, do you mind if I steal Victor away for just a moment? It won't be long,」Lev rests a hand on Kenma's shoulder, and Kenma understands the question is as much for Kenma's benefit as it is for Katsuki, checking to make sure Kenma is alright being left alone. Kenma catches Lev's eye and gives him a small nod.</p><p class="font_7">「Yes, you may,」Katsuki answers with a laugh.</p><p class="font_7">"What's this? You're letting me be stolen?" Victor asks him with a pout.</p><p class="font_7">"If your cousin needs to borrow you, my love, you should go with him,"</p><p class="font_7">«это будет быстро! Обещаю!» Lev tells him as he led Victor away by the arm.</p><p class="font_7">「Their resemblance is uncanny,」Katsuki says as they watch the two cousins go, a fond look on his face. Kenma hums in agreement, unsure of what to say.「He looks so much like Victor did when he was younger. That was before I met him, though.」</p><p class="font_7">Kenma looks at Katsuki's face, still watching Victor, and ses in his eyes something that looks like wistfulness. He is startled when Katsuki then turns to him.</p><p class="font_7">「Kozume-san-」</p><p class="font_7">「Kenma.」he interrupts. 「I'd prefer you call me Kenma, if that's alright with you.」</p><p class="font_7">「Alright, Kenma.」he smiles. 「Then you can call me Yuri, if you'd like.」</p><p class="font_7">「Are you sure?」</p><p class="font_7">Yuri nods.「Competing internationally, I'm very used to people I've never even met calling me by my given name. And you're not just a stranger, you're practically my cousin-in-law!」</p><p class="font_7">「Ah. That's...」Kenma starts to flush. Yuri isn't exactly wrong to say so, but it is a thought Kenma hadn't dared to think. So hearing it mentioned so casually by someone else...</p><p class="font_7">「Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to assume anything-」Yuri begins to apologize but was suddenly interrupted by-</p><p class="font_7">「<em>YURI-KUN!</em>」</p><p class="font_7">
    <em>Shouyou!?</em>
  </p><p class="font_7">Kenma whirls around in the direction the shout had come from, bewildered that Shouyou hadn't told Kenma he would be here, that he was here at all, that he seemed to know Yuri as well. But as it turns out, the voice does not belong to Shouyou at all, but rather the blond skater with a red streak who had seemed so familiar to Kenma and Lev.</p><p class="font_7">「Minami-kun!」Yuri answers brightly, accepting the younger man's embrace.</p><p class="font_7">「Your free skate was wonderful as always, Yuri-kun!」Minami to tells him, eyes shining with awe.</p><p class="font_7">「Thank you for saying so! But I couldn't measure up to you, it seems,」Yuri laughs, causing Minami to blush and scratch at the back of his head sheepishly.</p><p class="font_7">「Ehe, well, I still got beaten out by that Wakamiya kid. I don't know if anyone saw that coming!」</p><p class="font_7">「Aside from his fans,」Kenma speaks up, thinking of Riine.</p><p class="font_7">「Oh yeah! What was up with that woman with the baby? Was that his mom or something?」Minami asks.</p><p class="font_7">「You know, I think she's actually married to Wakamiya-kun's coach!」Yuri tells him.「Victor was talking to her earlier and she mentioned her wife was also a coach, but for cheer.」</p><p class="font_7">「And the baby...」Kenma realizes.</p><p class="font_7">「Their daughter!」</p><p class="font_7">「Aww, that's adorable!」Minami cooes.「...Oh! I didn't get your name, by the way,」he says, turning to Kenma.</p><p class="font_7">「Oh, of course! This is Kozume Kenma, he's a friend of Victor's cousin.」Yuri tells him, gesturing to Kenma.「Kenma, this is Minami Kenjirou.」</p><p class="font_7">「I'm Yuri-kun's biggest fan!」Minami adds, bowing to Kenma.「Nice to meet you, Kenma-kun!」</p><p class="font_7">「Nice to meet you,」Kenma bows back, frowning inwardly at being introduced merely as Lev's "friend," not that he blames Yuri for his overcorrection.</p><p class="font_7">「Is Victor's cousin a skater too? Are you?」He asks, getting slightly too close to Kenma for comfort in his excitement.</p><p class="font_7">「No...」Kenma answers, leaning away. Thankfully Kenjirou seems to take notice of this and moves back, so that Kenma can comfortably stand up straight again.</p><p class="font_7">「Oh. Well are you at least a fan?」</p><p class="font_7">「...To tell the truth, this was the first time I've ever seen a figure skating competition. But I really enjoyed it, and I think I learned a lot.」Kenma tells him with a small smile. After a moment, Kenjirou smiles back.</p><p class="font_7">「Then I'm glad!」</p><p class="font_7">It isn't just his voice - everything about him is reminiscent of Shouyou, especially the warm way he grins at Kenma now. Kenma is sure the two of them would get along famously.</p><p class="font_7">「Oh, Yuri-kun, I wanted to mention,」he says as he turns his attention back to Yuri.「I thought your music choice was really beautiful! The song was originally by Queen, right? What inspired you to pick that?」</p><p class="font_7">Kenma perks up at this question, remembering the way Yuri's performance had affected him.</p><p class="font_7">「It's a funny story, actually,」Yuri begins,「We were cleaning out some storage at Yu-topia, and I was going through my mother's old records when I found a copy of the original Japanese single! Well, one of Mari's friends found us a record player, and we were able to play it. I'd heard the song before, but something about listening to it on an actual record player really struck me.」</p><p class="font_7">「Wow, a real vinyl? That's so cool!」Kenjirou gasps.「But why skate to a cover then?」</p><p class="font_7">「To be honest, I just thought the orchestral sound of Aoi Teshima's cover was a better fit for the program I was already planning. Also, it uses the Japanese chorus more frequently, I thought that would get my feelings across better as well.」</p><p class="font_7">「I see, I see...」Kenjirou says, nodding thoughtfully. To be honest, Kenma has an instinct that Yuri wasn't telling the full truth. There is something else he had felt in Yuri's performance beyond a simple musical appreciation. He wonders what Yuri isn't telling Kenjirou, and why. What were those feelings he was trying to convey without words?</p><p class="font_7">「What were your thoughts, Kenma-kun?」Kenjirou asks, as though he has read Kenma's mind.</p><p class="font_7">「Yes, I'd love to hear your thoughts, if you don't mind sharing,」Yuri adds.</p><p class="font_7">「Well like I said, I'm very new to this...」</p><p class="font_7">「That's alright, Sometimes an untrained eye will notice things a professional won't!」</p><p class="font_7">After a pause, Kenma takes a deep breath.</p><p class="font_7">「...It gave me the impression of... loss. But also, of love, and of being in love, despite-」</p><p class="font_7">「We're back!」Kenma's train of thought is interrupted by Lev as he and Victor return to the group.</p><p class="font_7">"Yuri, my love, did you miss me?" Victor asks jokingly, pulling Yuri close again as he places a kiss to the top of his head, while Kenma takes hold of Lev's hand again. "Ah, and you've been located by Kenjirou!"</p><p class="font_7">"Yes, he and Kenma and I were discussing our programs when you returned-"「Minami-kun, this is Victor's cousin, Haiba Lev.」</p><p class="font_7">「I'm Yuri-kun's biggest fan, Minami Kenjirou! Nice to meet you!」Kenjirou says, inclining his head to Lev.</p><p class="font_7">「Whoaaaa!」Lev exclaims, 「This is going to sound weird but, you sound just like Hinata!」</p><p class="font_7">「I sound like who?」Kenjirou asks, his head tilting to one side.</p><p class="font_7">「Hinata Shouyou! He's a friend of ours, he's a professional volleyball player! Kenma, doesn't he sound like Hinata?」</p><p class="font_7">Kenjirou seems unsure how to respond to that. Kenma shakes his head with a smile while Yuri laughs.</p><p class="font_7">「Well, anyway, it's good to meet you, Minami!」Lev continues, bowing back,「But I thought Victor was Yuri's biggest fan?」</p><p class="font_7">「That's been a point of contention between them for a couple years now,」Yuri sighs.</p><p class="font_7">「Victor is married to Yuri! That doesn't count!」Kenjirou insists.</p><p class="font_7">"But Yuri was my biggest fan before he married me, doesn't that prove both things can be true?" Victor chimes in with an innocent smile.</p><p class="font_7">"Yeah but-!"</p><p class="font_7">"Minami-kun, let's just say you're my two biggest fans and leave it at that for now, alright?" Yuri says wearily.</p><p class="font_7">"But what about Yuri's sister and parents and-"</p><p class="font_7">"Lev, be quiet." Lev makes a small noise of indignation, but did as Kenma commands, which makes Yuri and Victor both laugh.</p><p class="font_7">"So! Dinner?" Victor says, clapping his hands together.</p><p class="font_7">"Ah! We know an izakaya really close to the stadium!" Lev offers.</p><p class="font_7">"Sounds good to me!" Yuri chimes in. "Minami-kun, would you like to come too?"</p><p class="font_7">"Yuri-kuuun! I would love to!" Kenjirou replies, looking almost on the verge of tears with happiness.</p><p class="font_7">"It's decided! Lyovochka, Kenma, lead the way!"</p><p class="font_7">And so the five men set off in the direction Lev indicates. Though Kenma is a bit daunted by the thought of dinner with three people he had only just met minutes ago, he feels reassured by the way Lev wraps an arm around his shoulders and pulls him close, as if to say "Don't worry about it, I've got your back!" He's pushed the limits of his anxiety before, and he can do it again, as long as he has Lev with him.</p><p class="font_7">Plus, considering how talkative Lev is and their company seem to be, it is possible Kenma might not have to say a single thing all night.</p>
<hr/><p class="font_7">Dinner goes like this:</p><p class="font_7">Lev and Kenma lead the way to an izakaya only a few blocks away - the same one Nekoma often frequented after matches, and where they'd taken Shouyou, Tobio and Yuu out to celebrate after their gold medal win. In fact, many world class athletes had been patrons of the establishment, thanks to its proximity to the Sports Plaza, and so the owners had started collecting Polaroids of them all. They completely cover the wall behind the cash register, and were beginning to inch around the corners. As soon as Victor realizes this, he loudly announces to the whole restaurant that Katsuki Yuri, renowned figure skater, is here, and shouldn't someone take a picture of him? Lev and Kenjirou join in boisterously, while Yuri himself tries to quiet them down, mentioning that Victor and Kenjirou ought to be included in the picture as well as they are just as renowned (if not more so), but to no avail. Luckily for him and Kenma (and the rest of the customers), the owner, a balding man in his sixties wearing enormous round spectacles, quickly appears and graciously requests a photo of all three of them. With Lev and Kenma's help the skaters are posed and the photo is taken. The owner recognizes the two of them from their many previous visits and thanks them for leading three more Olympians to his business as he tapes the new Polaroid right next to the one of Shouyou, Tobio and Yuu grinning (or trying to, in Tobio's case) with their gold medals from a few months earlier.</p></div><div class="">
  <p class="font_7">「If you keep this up I'll probably have to take one of you!」he jokes.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「That's nice of you, but no thanks,」Kenma tells him as he snaps a picture to send to Shouyou, while out of the corner of his eye he sees Lev nodding at the owner enthusiastically.</p>
  <p class="font_7">With the pressing issue of the Polaroid now squared away, the five men find their seats and begin looking over the menus. Kenma makes recommendations to Kenjirou and Yuri while Lev helps translate menu items for Victor. Between the language barrier and the three skaters' various dietary restrictions, it takes some time, but eventually everyone is able order. As they wait for their food to arrive they converse, mostly in English for Victor's benefit but with side conversations going on in both Japanese and Russian. Lev inundates Yuri with numerous questions (Did he live in Russia with Victor? Who else in their family had he met? What was it like when he lived in America?), which are all obligingly answered. Yuri has questions for Lev and Kenma as well, about school, interests, how they met, and so on, and though Lev does most of the answering, Kenma already feels comfortable enough to add things here and there. Victor is overjoyed at them all getting along so well, while Kenjirou prods Kenma for more information on the "Shouyou" Lev had mentioned earlier.</p>
  <p class="font_7">When their meals arrive the topic of conversation shifts back to the competition as they eat. Lev gushes about both Yuri and Kenjirou's performances, as well as Wakamiya's, and he cooes much like Kenjirou had when Yuri explains again about Wakamiya's coach and her wife and daughter. The three skaters all agree he would be a formidable opponent when he came to the world stage, and that he may even pose a challenge to "Yurio", another Russian skater and a close friend of theirs. Kenma mentions how they met Riine in the stands, and Victor laughs, saying Yurio wouldn't be happy that Wakamiya was stealing fanboys and girls that would once have been his.</p>
  <p class="font_7">Once everyone's meals are finished, Victor suggests they all stay and order drinks. Yuri is less than excited with this idea and tried to talk Victor out of it, and Kenma thinks he looks almost embarrassed at the suggestion, an embarrassment that only seems to grow the more Victor pushes it. Personally, Kenma would prefer if everyone stays sober, or at the very least if Lev does. (He recalls one dinner in particular where Lev and Shouyou had gotten themselves into a drinking competition and both ended up completely plastered; the ease and grace with which Takanobu had gently lifted Shouyou in his arms and carried him off bridal-style; the difficulty Kenma experienced in trying to keep his own, much larger boyfriend upright for more than five seconds at a time, much less getting him all the way home safely.) But as soon as the proposition is put forward, Lev becomes just as enthusiastic as his cousin about it. Kenjirou is ecstatic at the prospect of getting to drink with Yuri, but it is just then that his coach shows up to take him back to the hotel. His forlorn departure leaves the vote divided at two to two, and a compromise is reached of only one drink each.</p>
  <p class="font_7">So the night goes on. The four men continue chatting pleasantly, now slightly inebriated. Phones were passed around the table with photos of Momo and of Victor and Yuri's new puppy, a black standard poodle named Yulia. They share stories about their friends - both couples seem to be acquainted with quite a diverse cast of characters - and Victor regales Lev with tales from the last family reunion, before Lev was born.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「He's just retired, you know,」</p>
  <p class="font_7">It is late in the night at that point. Their drinks are all finished or mostly finished, and Victor is recounting how he and Alisa would cling to their older relatives' legs as they walked around. It takes a moment for Kenma to realize Yuri must be talking to him. He looks up to see Yuri gazing softly at Victor, head resting in his hand, as Lev informs Victor that Alisa is married now and Victor wails about how old he is.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「That's why he's here now instead of at Russian Nationals. No formal announcement or anything - he just didn't show up. And that was that.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">Kenma feels like he is hearing something he shouldn't, and isn't sure how to respond. But Yuri continues nonetheless.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「I love that about him, though. When he wants to do something, he just does it. When he doesn't want to do something, he doesn't. He doesn't feel the need to justify himself to anyone - if someone has a problem with the way he lives his life, they're not someone worth his time. I'm envious of him, but I also think being with him has made me better in that regard as well.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">「I know what you mean,」Kenma finally says, thinking of the ways in which Lev had changed him for the better.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「Even so, it seems as though I'm always following in his footsteps,」Yuri continues.「I'll probably be retiring at the end of this season. That's why I chose Teo Torriatte for my free skate.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">「It wasn't because of your mom's record?」Kenma asks.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「Well, that was what gave me the initial idea.」Yuri clarifies.「When we were cleaning out the storage, it was only a few days after Victor had told me he would be retiring, so it was weighing on my mind. We first fell in love on the ice, so I was worried about how ending our careers could affect our relationship.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">Kenma feels his pulse quicken. It sounds a lot like what he'd been worrying about the last few months - fearing what Lev's graduation could mean for the two of them.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「So when I heard the lyrics, they seemed to me to be about love remaining strong despite the seasons of life changing. "Let us hold hands as the years go by, let our light always burn, let us never forget what we've learned." In all honesty, my whole free skate program is meant to be a message to him. I want to tell him that, even though this part of our lives is coming to an end, I still want for us to cling together no matter what, and to cherish the memories we've made and the things we've learned from one another.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">Kenma considers this silently, staring at a bowl of empty edamame shells on the table. He has concerned himself so much with his many anxieties about the future, some of them understandable and some of them beyond logic, that he has failed to see what was at the heart of them all. But really, he wants the same thing that Yuri does, doesn't he? Kenma just wants to stay by Lev's side as long as he could, no matter what the future held. In truth, he isn't much scared of change after all, not anymore; he can weather whatever tomorrow held, as long as he has Lev's hand in his own. Maybe all he is really afraid of was that Lev doesn't know just how deeply Kenma loves him.</p>
  <p class="font_7">And if that is the case, shouldn't Kenma just tell him so?</p>
  <p class="font_7">「Thank you,」Kenma finally speaks up,「for sharing that with me. Your program really resonated with me, and I couldn't understand it, but I know why now. 」</p>
  <p class="font_7">「Thank you, Kenma.」Yuri replies,「It always means a lot to me to hear that my performances touch others. And thank you for letting me open up to you, but, uh... please don't repeat what I said about retiring,」he adds sheepishly.</p>
  <p class="font_7">Kenma chuckles.「Not that I know anyone of import to repeat it to, but sure, your secret is safe with me.」</p>
  <p class="font_7">Just then, Lev yawns loudly, and slumps awkwardly over the table to rest his head on Kenma's shoulder.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「Kenmaaaaaa, I'm tired,」he groans.</p>
  <p class="font_7">「I told you we shouldn't have drinks, didn't I? But you wouldn't listen to me,」Kenma huffs.</p>
  <p class="font_7">"We should probably get going soon, too," Yuri says through a yawn of his own, checking the time, "We have to be on the road early tomorrow morning so we still have plenty of time at Yu-topia for Victor's birthday."</p>
  <p class="font_7">Lev shoots upright again with a gasp.</p>
  <p class="font_7">"Oh no! Vitya, I forgot tomorrow was your birthday! I didn't get you a gift, please forgive me!" he claps his hands together, pleading for Victor to show him mercy.</p>
  <p class="font_7">"How could you do this to me, my own beloved cousin!" Victor pouts.</p>
  <p class="font_7">"Can I make it up to you? I'll get you something extra-good for... what is it called, Hanka?"</p>
  <p class="font_7">"I'll hold you to that then, Lyovochka!"</p>
  <p class="font_7">The four men gather their belongs and head to the exit, bidding farewell to the izakaya owner and his wife as they pass. They stand outside and converse a little longer as they wait for Victor and Yuri's hotel car to arrive. Goodbyes are exchanged along with phone numbers - Lev embraces Yuri this time as well as Victor, and Yuri seems a little overwhelmed by Lev's stature, which makes Kenma laugh to himself. Kenma has to wave Yuri off from hugging him, but thankfully Yuri is understanding and gives him a pat on the shoulder instead. Finally the car arrives and they wave their last goodbyes as the two skaters get in and drive off. Lev and Kenma walk back to the train station, clinging close to each other for warmth as they make their way back home.</p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sooooo i wanted this fic to be completed by new years but idk if itll happen at this rate, i have a cold and once im feeling better ill have to go back to work anyway, and also my dog isn't doing so well these days :( but ill definitely complete the fic eventually so look forward to it!</p><p>this fic is mirrored on <a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte-ch-5">my new fanfiction website!</a></p><p>
  
</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading!<br/>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>this fic is mirrored on <a href="https://pebe1997.wixsite.com/gingerslapnotion/teo-torriatte">my new fanfic website!</a> go check it out!</p><p>twitter: @killiakill</p></blockquote></div></div>
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